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O I currently staying at my Parents Sleeping on their Sofa as Mum is bedridden and has Alzheimers. She can not snd or walk.She sleeps almost all

Stuart 1965

New member
Sep 19, 2021
Day everyday It seems Dad has Dementia. He is mobile gets confused with the time and days.Wanders about at night and sleeps a lot during the day.Last weekend he started shouting and swearing at me that he hadn't eaten all day this was 5am on the Sunday morning He sometimes gies to bed at 8p. And then he is in the shower at 10pm getting ready and dressed

he tarted shouting v and swearing at me at 5am that he wS hungry amd hadn't eaten all day

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Hello @Stuart1965. Welcome to Talking Point. You certainly need help.

Have you had contact with Social Services? You have taken responsibility for two vulnerable adults and it`s too much to ask of anyone.

Please contact Dementia Connect Support Line. They are open today.

Support line opening hours:​

Monday to Wednesday9am – 8pm
Thursday and Friday9am – 5pm
Saturday and Sunday10am – 4pm
*Calls charged at standard local rate


Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
Welcome to the forum @Stuart 1965. I’m so sorry to read about your situation but I’m so glad you have found this forum.

Please take Sylvia’s advice and give Dementia Connect a call. Keep posting here too - you will get lots of understanding and support from members.


Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
hello @Stuart 1965
a warm welcome from me too

it's fortunate that your parents have you to be looking out for them .... however, what you describe is not a situation that is good for any of you and it's not sustainable

definitely give the support line a call

and get in touch with your parents' Local Authority Adult Services ... there will be contact details on their website ... please consider calling the emergency number and telling them exactly how things are for your parents ... say they are both 'vulnerable adults' as your mum has dementia and your dad is displaying very worrying symptoms and behaviour ... that both are 'at risk of harm' through self neglect, as your mum cannot support herself and your dad cannot support himself and her ... let them know that you cannot remain at their home and fear what will happen when you leave (I appreciate that you will not abandon your parents but Social Services need to believe that you will have to go back to your own home or they may well assume you will continue to provide hands on care) ... to really get their attention say you think this situation is a 'safeguarding issue' as your parents cannot look after themselves

also have a chat with their GP, or at least send a detailed description of how things are for your parents .. the GP might not be able to discuss them with you (unless you have Power of Attorney and you consider they no longer have capacity to manage their health and welfare) but has to note any information given by family and hopefully will take some action ... ask that the GP make a referral to Social Services too

I hope you are able to get some help