1. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    SW Scotland
    Dear Diane, i read your other post first, and wondered what had happened. I know it would be bad, but didn't expect it to be as bad as this.

    You've made the right decision, love. I've said no to hospital for John when he gets to that stage. It's far better for our loved ones to be cared for by people they know, who will give them love and comfort as well as all that medecine can provide.

    Thinking of you, and praying for you and your mum and dad.

    Love and hugs,
  2. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    Diane dear, what cn anyone say? Your decision and yours alone.

    As Jennifer and Hazel have already said, they agree with you, and its a decision I have already made for my Lionel.

    That, however, does not help you at this time.
    My thoughts and prayers are with you and the family. Try to stay strong, sending love n'hugs..
  3. Susi T

    Susi T Registered User

    Jan 12, 2007
    Leamington Spa
    Hi Diane

    I had to make the same decision 2 over 2 weeks ago, sadly Dad died 2 weeks today, I looked at my Dad and knew I had made the right decision. I had watched him over the last 15 months go from a reasonably healthy elderly gentleman to a wasted skeletal elderly gentleman! I have laid his ashes with my late mum's today and I know it was a happy release and they are reunited with each other. I know that I was right to let him drift away, however, my thoughts are with you. God bless.

    Susi XX
  4. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    Dear Diane

    You know you have made the right decision. You don`t need approval or permission from anyone. It is what most of us would want for ourselves.
    Take care
    Love xx
  5. Lanie

    Lanie Registered User

    Aug 31, 2008
    Diane you've made the right decision and I would do the same for my Mum.

    Thinking of you.

  6. JeanD

    JeanD Registered User

    Sep 16, 2008
    Diane I am so sorry your mother is so poorly. You are doing everything you can for her. I am sure you will make the right decisions. I would do the same as you. Don't forget to take care of yourself too. love Jean.
  7. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    south lanarkshire
    Hi Diane

    It is the decision I would (and will) make for my Mum

    Thinking of you

  8. Helen33

    Helen33 Registered User

    Jul 20, 2008
    Dear Diane

    I just wanted to send a hug and to wish your mum a peaceful end.

    Love and best wishes to you and all your loved ones at this very difficult time.
  9. Lynne

    Lynne Registered User

    Jun 3, 2005
    Dear Diane

    I'm so sorry ... what else is there to say?

    I totally agree with the decisions you & your Dad have made in the circumstances, and hope your Mum remains reasonable comfortable & peaceful to the end.
    At least you & Dad are of one mind at this most stressful time, not at opposite ends of the rope, and have the support of the doctor & the c.h. manager.

    Thinking of you, with love

    Attached Files:

  10. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    Sorry to read what happen to your mother, don’t worry about what anyone else thing there not living in your shoes or your mothers, you know you done the right thing that’s all that matter .

    Sending you lots of love ((( big hug )))
  11. May

    May Registered User

    Oct 15, 2005
    Diane, thinking of you,your Mum and Dad. Hoping that your Mum passes peacefully with the people who love and care around her. You made the right decision, bless you and sending hugs.
  12. mum of two

    mum of two Registered User

    Oct 3, 2008
    Dear Diane,
    I do hope that you all find a bit of peace in your very stressfull time . Take care
    From Mum of two
  13. DianeB

    DianeB Registered User

    May 29, 2008
    Just thought I would do an update. Its been pretty emotional since I last posted.
    Mums condition is difficult to try and explain now, as she had the 2 bleeds, and the Dr thinks its an ulcer. She now has blood in her stools and very anaemic. Her feet and ankles are very swollen something she has never suffered with before. The Dr goes in every day to check on Mum. Somedays she is on a high and sometimes she is advised to go to bed to rest. Somedays she will eat others she wont eat or drink. She is on medicine for her stomach, ankles and is having pain relief.
    I have never been on such an emotional roller coaster as this, one minute I think thats it I'm losing her and the next she ralies round.
    To top the lot I ended up having my nephew here for a week on suicide watch, I cracked in the end and had to take him back for members of the family to help out, I just can't deal with his emotional problems as well as my own, and unfortunately his dad (my brother in law) got it full pelt on Sunday. Fortunately my in laws backed me and said it was about time somebody said something to him anyway.
    My sons girlfriend has given birth to a little girl yesterday, although it isn't his child the baby was born 7 weeks early and she is now in an incubater.
    Dad is being fine with me which under these circumstances is a blessing, no more outbursts ;).... he probably knows he also could run the risk of me cracking and that is a side Dad don't want to see, so it's him now treading carefully.
    The home are being brill, I really couldn't ask for more.

    Many thanks for all the tremendous support and heartfelt thoughts you have sent us, they have really helped us. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
  14. Laylabud

    Laylabud Registered User

    Sep 7, 2007
    Hi Diane

    I really feel for you, what a rollercoaster you have been on and still will for days still to come. You have come this far and i am sure you will find the strength to carry on regardless.
    Your Parents are so lucky to have such a wonderful caring daughter like you i am sure that they are very proud.
    Try and take some time for you that is very important as you need to come to terms with things in your own way and your own time. People who have not dealt with this cruel illness do not understand what you are going through, they can only offer words of comfort, which don't get me wrong is great but sometimes i want to shout and scream at them and say "you don't understand and don't keep telling me it is the illness" You also have the complication of other things now affecting your dear Mum's health.
    Keep strong, we are all think of you at this difficult time.

    Sending you lots of love and hugs
  15. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    SW Scotland
    Dear Diane

    Thank you for the update, I was wondering how things were with you. It is indeed a rollercoaster!

    Take care of yourself, you're so important to your mum and dad. You're doing brilliantly, coping with everything.

    I hope your your mum will soon be a bit better, at least she is managing to eat and drink a little.

    I hope the baby also does well, that will cheer you up!:)

    Try to keep us up to date if you can, we care about you.

  16. DianeB

    DianeB Registered User

    May 29, 2008
    Thank you Laylabud and Hazel. I just couldn't face posting as it all seemed so negative. I am grabbing on to 'good' days as best as I can, although they don't come by very often. These are the memories I will treasure.
    This morning I took in a deep breath and started to post.
  17. Mameeskye

    Mameeskye Registered User

    Aug 9, 2007
    Hi Diane

    Your words about your Mum reminded me f my last 18 months that I had with her. The roller coaster, the ups and downs ..but you are doing the right thing, take the good times and treasure these small memories. They are warm and good thoughts to have and to remember


  18. DianeB

    DianeB Registered User

    May 29, 2008
    Mum wouldn't eat today and is now in pain with her tummy. They are giving her pain relief, I can only pray it's strong enough. Her feet and ankles are now double the size.
  19. lilacwarm

    lilacwarm Registered User

    Apr 5, 2008
    thinking of you through these difficult times
    kind regards to you and your family
  20. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    Hello Diane

    I`m so sorry you are having such a difficult time.

    However tragic your nephew`s condition is your family shouldn`t expect more from you than you can give. You have enough on your plate already with the worry of your mother and father.

    Try to post, however negative you feel. Alzheimers is a negative condition and we are all at one with you. Sometimes you need to get it out of your system and this is the place to do it.

    Love xx

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