Not sure what is happening

Fluffyduck217

Registered User
May 22, 2015
4
0
Hello This is my first post. My Mum has had dementia for nearly five years, she lived on her own with help from carers until last summer when she kept wandering out at night so I took the huge decision to have her home with me and give up work to look after her until Christmas, when her mood swings and demands where very difficult and she became increasingly immobile. She is now in a care home where she settled quickly but became very vocal, shouting all the time and not always nice things! Anyway she was admitted to hospital on Tues this week with a nasty UTI, had intravenous antibiotics for 48 hours and is now clear but she is still in hospital not eating or cooperating with anything or anyone, she screams when the nurses do anything for her and in my opinion seems to have given up. Is this possible? I am trying to speak to the doctor today. Thanks.x
 

Tin

Registered User
May 18, 2014
4,820
0
UK
Dear Fluffyduck, Sad isn't it, but she probably hasn't given up, ranting and shouting at staff is all part of her Dementia. At this time being treated for infection if she was at the care home or in your home she would probably be doing exactly the same. That's what I think anyway. Give her and yourself some time.
 

Jackie3

Registered User
Nov 27, 2012
14
0
Oldham
Dear Fluffyduck, Sad isn't it, but she probably hasn't given up, ranting and shouting at staff is all part of her Dementia. At this time being treated for infection if she was at the care home or in your home she would probably be doing exactly the same. That's what I think anyway. Give her and yourself some time.

My mum has late stage dementia and has been bedbound for 15 months. Prior to this she has been through similar episodes to this. Infection does strange things to people and those with dementia react badly. Once the infection is cleared she may settle down. There are various stages in dementia and my mum also went through an aggressive stage when she would shout, scream and lash out. We put it down to frustration that she is unable to communicate what she wants to say. We found that distraction worked quite well but the best thing we found was music. Listening to music especially familiar music has a calming effect. I doubt your mum has given up. Most likely a combination of the infection and frustration associated with her dementia. Also being in unfamiliar surroundings is confusing and will add to her anxiety.
 

Fluffyduck217

Registered User
May 22, 2015
4
0
Thank you for your comments. It is so upsetting to watch the decline of somebody you care for. The hospital have said there is not anything medically they can do for Mum but her Care Home wont have her back because of her incapacity to help herself. That's something I now have to investigate as I thought the point of her being in a home was because of that reason!
 

katek

Registered User
Jan 19, 2015
191
0
Thank you for your comments. It is so upsetting to watch the decline of somebody you care for. The hospital have said there is not anything medically they can do for Mum but her Care Home wont have her back because of her incapacity to help herself. That's something I now have to investigate as I thought the point of her being in a home was because of that reason![/QUOTE

That is a very difficult situation to be in and I really feel for you, having experienced something similar with my father. The difference is that he was still mobile, less vocal but more physical in his resistance to care.

I can understand the hospital's view (and she can't obviously just stay there anyway), but at the same time, standard care homes are just not able to cope with people at this level. When my father's care home could no longer cope with him (even though it was for people with dementia), he went to an assessment unit for several months, was awarded Continuing Health Care, then went on to a small NHS unit specifically for people with AD who have challenging behaviour. The staff are adequately trained - many are actually mental health nurses - and cope magnificently with whatever happens. Unfortunately, from what I gather, there are not that many of these units around, so it may mean - as in our case - being some distance away from family, but it is so much more suitable than a care home.

It sounds like your mother really needs to go to an assessment unit to establish what she now needs and where that level of care can best be given.
 
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