Not happy with care home

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by lizabeth, Oct 17, 2007.

  1. lizabeth

    lizabeth Registered User

    Oct 17, 2007
    I am new to the forum and to any forum so please excuse any mistakes. I need some advice. We live in North london and recently my mother went into emergancy respite. she is 82 with Lewy Body and I am her only living next of kin. I have a family 2 children 10 and 12 and work full time. We did everything we could to keep her in her sheltered flat but her agression displayed in Day care and her wandering prevented this as a realistic option. In May we accepted she needed 24 hour care and were working with social workers to find her a placement close to us. but they kept delaying things. See we work live and go to school and my mother lived all in less than a one mile radius. The problem was that the care homes in our area were quite nice and maybe a bit too expensive for Council funding. My mother worked hard all her life but her dementia caused her to loose her home. She has a pension etc... is about £1200 per month. Now she has been placed in a care home that frankly reeks of urine to the point all her clothes - even her tops smell so strong it is difficult being in an enclosed car with her. She is the most lucid person there and even a son of another resident told me the care home is not right for her. He didn't know anything about my concerns but walked up to me - introduced himself and told me to move her out. I am now being told that this emergancy respite placement in now permanent without a formal consultation.

    I wrote a complaint letter and it is now in stage one. What are our rights? Do we have the right to deny a placement? I believe the placement is driven by economics and I have been sold a false set of good by the social worker. The ironic aspect of all this is that she was means tested before so the Council was paying up to £600 a week for full time day care and one hour a day home visits. Now she will pay the council her money and that is ok but they will only be paying £190 a week. The care home most suited for her and her Dr. supports would leave the council paying £300 a week. It is most difficult to visit and my children and my health and my mother's happiness are suffering. I was even told by the care home owner and the social worker not to visit much as it takes her out of her own little word and thus can make her more difficult to manage. Another care home manager told me my mother's human rights were in violation and I needed to seek leagal advise. We are poor what can we do?
  2. rhallacroz

    rhallacroz Registered User

    Sep 24, 2007
    So Sorry

    Dear Lizabeth
    So sorry to hear your plight. What can you do. FIrstly is there anywhere else you can place your mum. She doesn;t appear to be in the right place. Have you sold her home.Can you take her home take a weeks holiday and stay with her and then demand a home package that can support her. I am in the process of trying to get a care package for my mum who lives with dad but needs more that 20 hours support. With the new legislation about care at home and continuing health care needs perhap s you should get your mp on board.. Keep posting to get help.
    Keep your chin up
  3. Taffy

    Taffy Registered User

    Apr 15, 2007
    Dear Lizabeth,
    This is a such a sad post. I can't comment on the placement situation as the system in Australia seems to be different from my understanding of what happens in the UK.

    Money, well that seems to come before people's welfare no matter where you are.

    If your mum is not settling in, then it is not unusual to request that you let visits go for a few days even a week. My understanding is that your mum has been there sometime, so personally I would visit as often as I pleased, especially if your not happy with things.

    I hope that this can be all sorted out and you can move your mum.

    Sorry that you have such worries. Best Wishes Taffy.
  4. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    #4 Grannie G, Oct 19, 2007
    Last edited: Oct 19, 2007
    This is unacceptable. It has nothing to do with being poor, it is to do with low standards.

    I would contact the AS helpline 0845 300 0336. 8.30 a.m. -6.30 p.m.

    Age Concern 0800 009966 8 a.m. - 7 p.m.

    Citizens Advice Bureau

    If you are poor, you should be able to get free legal advice.

    Legal Aid helpline 0845 345 4345

    Take care

    Love xx
  5. Cate

    Cate Registered User

    Jul 2, 2006
    Newport, Gwent
    Dear Lizabeth

    Not having been in this situation myself, I cannot offer anything practical, but Sylvia has given you some numbers who I am sure will be able to help you.

    I just wanted to say how sorry I am, and I hope you are able to move your mum quickly. I would also say that you should complain to the inspectors, but frankly you clearly have enough on your plate.

    Keep in touch, let us know how you are getting on.


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