Thank you, the callousness of it all is unbelievable. SL
Hello Silver Lining, I am having similar problems with my husband of 48 loving years. We have taken him to a Home for dementia and Alzheimers, doing their best - we have seen it all before, they say. Its my first time to witness the progress of this horrific affliction.
Something deep inside his brain wakes up and utters words that cut me to the quick. About 'taking him there, when he doesnt want to be there; about me stealing his money and inheritance; about whose side are you on anyway. He was sexually demanding at home, but couldn't remember properly.
At the Home the disease makes him slide to the floor out of his chair and not get up. He grips our hands and wrists painfully, makes to bite us. I think he is so terrified of the disease and the changes happening to him, that these are some of the only behaviours he can manage to show protest at the loss he is experiencing. Yes, he is on medication, and we wait for MRI results to eliminate a brain tumour. Then the doctor will prescribe new medication.
Silver Lining - your husband is not being deliberately callous, it is the disease speaking. I also find myself beginning to fall out of love with mine because of what he utters now and again, almost every day.
I try not to look for the truth in what he says, he is confused, depressed and frightened. Perhaps your husband is too, like my husband is.
May the medication treat his depression and give him back some quality of life on this awful journey we are all on. Talk to his and your doctor about how you feel. Take care, look after yourself.