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No diagnosis

Rosie1935

New member
Sep 30, 2021
2
0
My gran was referred to a geriatrician by GP for review due to memory/mood issues - she forgets most recent things and her mood swings are unbelievable - quite very aggressive out of no where, accuses us of stealing her money/jewellery etc (she keeps misplacing them) She also has a large ulcer on her leg and does not leave it alone, the nurse dresses it 2-3 times per week and she constantly takes the dressing off and says nobody looks at her leg/nobody cares etc - this is ongoing since March but yet she will say she only has it a week.

At the Geriatrician she said she gets up herself, makes all her own meals, doesn’t suffer pain, only sees her family 1-2 times per week etc - none of which is true but then she was able to correctly tell him what has been in the news recently and that a social worker visited her which she didn’t like. The doctor did not ask for any family input or to verify if what she said was telling the truth but just said that he sees no issues with her memory.

I nearly feel like we are going mad/imaging things - has anyone been in a similar situation? The GP/Public nurse were (as were we) really waiting on a diagnosis today to help move forward with her care - as the know her that can see there is definitely an issue
 

Banjomansmate

Registered User
Jan 13, 2019
3,077
0
Dorset
Did your Gran go in to see the Consultant by herself? I always went in with The Banjoman and sat outside of his field of vision so that I could indicate to the medic whether he was telling the truth. His GP actually asked that I always accompanied him when he visited her.
I am always amazed that the medical profession always seem prepared to accept the word of someone who goes to see them with suspected dementia.
 

Rosie1935

New member
Sep 30, 2021
2
0
Hi, thanks for reply. Yes she was accompanied by her daughter but when any input or contradiction was given to what gran said he just said he was asking the questions and if she could refrain from speaking unless asked to 🤷🏻‍♀️ We’re simply baffled
 

Palerider

Registered User
Aug 9, 2015
2,722
0
North West
Hmmm by experience I know that some professionals don't like to label their patients and will move to state 'mild cognitive impairment' (MCI) rather than announce dementia (which ever type or mixed) and hope thats it.

But, we all know its not enough when we see changes in our loved ones and we need to know what it is we are dealing with. I agree with @Banjomansmate and I used to go to mums GP and I would sit behind her and verify fact from other tales that were told, but at that stage mum had a diagnosis.

I would ask the GP to consider writing back to the consultant and ask that s/he takes another look at the case and consider the whole picture

Edited: or ask for a second opinion
 

Lawson58

Registered User
Aug 1, 2014
2,555
0
Victoria, Australia
My husband sees his geriatrician every six months and it is a very different experience to yours.

We arrive at his office and while we are waiting I complete a page of a few simple questions about his recent behaviour. Then OH goes off to do some testing and I spend some time with the geriatrician updating him on recent changes and concerns. When OH joins us, the geriatrician keeps things at what I would call a conversation but probes into how my husband is feeling.

This works very well. And I would have to say that even during the original assessment process, my opinions and knowledge of my husband was always considered important and valued by both the geriatrician and the memory clinic team.
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
15,702
0
South coast
The observations of people closest to the person referred to the memory clinic is of great importance and should be part of the consultation. I think that asking your GP for a second opinion is in order here.
 

Jaded'n'faded

Registered User
Jan 23, 2019
2,021
0
High Peak
Posts like these make me so annoyed! Why is it that so-called experts will listen only to the person (with dementia) and tell family to shut up?! If they were as good as they think they are, they would listen to family and would - one would hope - know that people with dementia often exhibit host/hostess mode when seeing a doctor and often confabulate/lie through their teeth if they think it will help.

They are letting so many people down :(

My suggestions:
1) write a letter to the consultant detailing the changes in behaviour you are seeing. Point out that what was said (by the person) during the consultation was completely incorrect/inaccurate. Point out that it's very much part of the problem that the person doesn't realise they can no longer do the things they claim to do, i.e. that they have lost capacity.
2) get a second opinion.