Hello all, I have been reading these forums for a while and finally joined today. My father has advanced alzheimers, so far he has been cared for at home by my mother, they are both elderly (85)To be honest caring for him is getting too much for her now. She does have a 20 min call in a morning from a care company to get him up showered and dressed. He is doubly incontenant and mum takes him to the toilet before bed, gets up at 3 am and 7 am to take him to the toliet, if she doesnt he wets the bed. She has special sheets but even those are washed quite a lot. 3 times last night she had to change the bed in spite of doing the toilet trips. He has started toileting in places where he thinks is the toilet, chairs, stools etc, seems to have no warning or doesnt know he needs to go. My mum is nearly blind, she has severe macular degeneration and has now got another condition on top of this. She really struggles to care for my father, struggles to see where he may have toileted, if his clothes are dirty etc. Dad doesnt talk much now, I think he has lost a lot of words, he is very confused, he cannot do simple tasks now, everything is done for him. He is becoming very angry bless him, easily aggitated. Mum is frightened of him some times, as he threatens her terribly. He is now struggling to get up from the settee at night, so it is becoming a problem getting him to bed as she cant lift him. We applied for nhs continuing care and got turned down. I only found out today after asking if she had heard, she has had the letter 6 months, read the first bit saying no with a magnifier and filed it. Fancy sending small print to a nearly blind person, she doesnt like to ask people to help. I have rang them today and said I want to appeal it, and complain also of them not treating her fairly sending her letters she cannot read without help. I have no clue how to appeal as yet, I just dont like her being dismissed easily, the letter says he only has social needs. I shall try and research what I need to do about this. Should they take her needs into account? the fact that she is lame , had a triple heart bypass and shouldnt lift and is nearly blind? Am I roght in thinking she should be provided with respite so she gets a break ? The assessment which I was present for didnt seem to take into account his mental/ brain issues/ problems, it seemed to be aimed at more physical disability. They say we need dr's support, their dr's are rubbish, they wont come out to him, they have said to mum they wont talk about dad to her ?? who else are they going to speak to ? No support whatsoever from the dr's, he attends the memory service, they say he is stable, which is the biggest joke ever, non of us believe he got the same score on their tests as he did 18 months ago. They did it in private, wouldnt let us see the results, or have him do the test infront of us. Its like a big conspiracy, as if they are all protecting the nhs from him possibly trying to get any funding. Mum and family has taken care of him for the last 12 years , with no support. Finally we have got incontenance pants after asking twice before, we actually got refused and told they didnt believe us. for years we have been buying these. I feel really sorry for them, they have always worked and contributed to the system and in their time of need seem to be struggling to get any help.
Thank you
Thank you