First posting for me but I've been a reader of TP for a while and found it extremely helpful especially the times then I've felt I'm the only person going through this. Mum suffered her first stroke in Jan'07 and whilst in hospital was diagnosed with terminal cancer with an 8 week prognosis. I was advised to put her in a home but I decided to give up my managerial job, become her full-time carer and have mum come and live her last few weeks with us. She was in a terrible state and a terminal care package (8 weeks) was set up. When the 8 week deadline passed I received a letter from the PCT stating that as she had passed the 8 week deadline all care facilities would now be withdrawn and a care assessment had decided that I didn't need help as I was doing a good job on my own - I still have that letter as I was absolutely dumbfounded that people who were not with my mum 24/7 could make this decision. She then suffered another stroke and was diagnosed with vascular dementia and became somebody I no longer knew. She suffered hallucinations,walkabouts,periods of aggression and abuse directed at me and my other half and also being accused of selling her house and stealing the money. She has also tried her best to split my partner and I up even though he has been wonderful to her. The past 15 months have been horrific and to his day she still resents me for taking away her independence, will never accept that she can no longer live on her own and that she lives with us because we love her. Fortunately, at the moment, she is going through a quiet period and now goes to day care which she enjoys and occasionally she goes to short stay respite to give us a rest and some time on our own. Mum has recently undergone more tests for the cancer and the doctors are amazed that she is still with us, so all we can do is take each day as it comes as there are no answers but I know that when I am feeling down I can log onto TP and know that I am not alone with my heartache. Thank you.