1. jane@hotmail

    jane@hotmail Registered User

    Mar 13, 2008
    49
    Bedfordshire
    A bit of a tribute to our wonderful dad!

    Thanks for your kind responses. Just to let you know that for the moment, mum is still at home with the carer. I live 1hr 15 mins from my mum and my sister, who has cerebal pausy lives 1hr away. We go to mums everyday, so the carer can take 3 hrs off. It's o.k for now, but we have to get support incase we're not able to make it. Social services have never been involved because dad thought that if they got involved they would tell him she could'nt stay at home and she'd be put in a care home. Social services were a real fear for him. I think that we need to start asking for thier help though. In time we'd like to move mum closer to us, but shes just lost her husband of almost 60 years and although she is'nt mourning like us, she's very scared. Her rock has gone and she doesnt no why she feels so lonely, it's very sad. We don't want to make any major changes just yet.
    My dad was an incrediable man,who worked hard all his life,and has made sure that we're able to pay for mums care for many years to come. We're so fortunate that we can have a say in how she is cared for. I can't imagine being in this position with no support and having to fight for any sort of aid and having no choices. I'm sad that both my parents worked so hard, never took holidays and looked after thier money carefully incase they were put in this position. My mothers father had Alzhiemers and it was always important to my dad that mum had money, so she could be cared for if he died. Some people would say you should'nt worry about things like that, but my dad was very independent and believed we should all be responsible for ourselves. He died with the regret that we had to take on the responsibility of caring for mum. He's made it easier for us, though ,with his planning, and when it came to responsibility, he was a very good teacher. There was over 200 people at his funeral last week, with lots of stories of how he'd helped them in so many ways and had been such a good friend to so many, never asking anything of them. We're very proud to have had him as our father.

    Jane x
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,572
    Kent
    Dear Jane,
    What a wonderful and well deserved tribute to your father.
    I`m not surprised you are proud of him and in return he would also be very proud of you.
    Love xx
     
  3. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Jane, thank you for sharing that with us.

    Your love and admiration for your dad shine through every word, and he would be so proud of you.

    Take some time to take care of yourself now, as well as caring for your mum. You deserve it.

    Love,
     

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