Hello to you all. My father has a diagnosis of advanced alzheimer's. He lives alone, near to myself and my brother. He was diagnosed about 18 months ago but we had been trying to get him to see his GP way before this. The situation as it is at the present time is that he has carers from an agency visit 3 times a day for personal care and help with meals. By the way, we had to fight tooth and nail with him for this as her was insistent that 'I know what I need to know and do what I need to do - and that's it!!' He also goes to a day centre twice a week and we transport him. We visit him daily but we all work full time as well. The social worker who assessed his needs has closed the case now. Dad has started to urinate up has kitchen cupboards; soil himself at times; go to bed with all his clothes on - shoes as well; refuse personal care; be sexually inapropriate with me; wander at night banging on neighbours doors and shouting; get lost when he goes out during the day; and he does not recognise us as his family any more. He says he has no family and hasn't seen them for years. He thinks we are his friends. He gets de-hydrated as he doesn't eat or drink unless you put things in his hands. He did not want to go to the day centre at first but now likes it and asks if he can go to 'his club' often. Whenever we go to see hime he is always curled up in a ball on his sofa. He gets very depressed and says he wants to die. As a family, we don't know whether he would have a better quality of life living in a care home now. It's such a hard decision. Our parents had my nan living with them and they always told us never to do that with them as it put their lives on hold until my nan died - and my mom died shortly after that. After mom died dad used to ask me to finish him off rather than put him in a home. I think I would end up battering him if he lived with me and it brings tears to my eyes to say that - I feel so guilty. He's always been such a good dad to us. How do we know when it is the right time for a care home? We would appreciate any support or constructive advice at all. Ta. Sorry it's lengthy!!