New to site, just having tests.

Discussion in 'Younger people with dementia and their carers' started by rinnes23, Dec 8, 2011.

  1. rinnes23

    rinnes23 Registered User

    Dec 8, 2011
    Hi everyone,

    I have come to this blog as I am just having tests for memory issues and some behavioural problems. I am worried as I am in full time employment and the bread winner. There is no one else I can talk too as my friends seem to think I'm just stressed or depressed neither of which I am other than the everyday stresses that is.

    They don't seem to realise how frightening it is when you set off to do something, forget what you were going to do,then do something different which I thought was right then only later realise you didn't do the right thing when another person asks you for the first task - gosh does that make sense!

    I wasn't aware I had an issue other than I knew it took me a long time to get out of the house and I am always late until my hubby lost the rag with me in the summer and the problem was bigger than just misplacing my car keys! I am a dizzy distracted person so it was easy to blame things on my general forgetfullness. How ever my performance at work is going down and I just couldn't figure out why, basically going around in circles but didn't realise I wasn't getting anywhere.

    I'm not really aware of stuff I do or rather don't do but I do know that something isn't right then feel frustrated and angry because idon't know whats wrong until my daughter or hubby asks if teas nearly ready then I realise too late that I was cooking dinner and fed the cat instead. It's also really embarassing to say the least. You can only laugh so much, oh and I've got a very fat cat.

    I have a horse (very lucky) I can ride and manage everything but can't tie her up because I have forgotten the knot, at first I just made a bad job, laughed it off but didn't realise what the issue was until someone nearly got hurt when my horse panicked and the rope got stuck, my friend shouted at me and I burst into tears as I realised I don't know how to tie the knot, how could I be so stupid. Anyway once I calmed down and we had a chat in private she realised I was completly unable to tie the knot she can show me then I instantly forget, she thought I was joking as I seem completely normal in every other way but each time she showed me it was like a new skill got it, walked away she'd call me back and no hope of recalling that bloody knot. We have since bought me elastic break away ties so no more knots but so embarassing especially when I can still do everything else, apart from turn up on time that is!! This is just one of many experiences but so scary and I feel so stupid. I can drive no problem but run out of fuel so often my hubby now checks my gauge for me (we live a long way from a petrol station) I am also scared they won't find any thing which sounds even more insane as I know things are not right but will they just think I'm a nutter?!? To be honest i would love to be told I was depressed cause at least I can then get on with a treatment but I hate too say it I'm a very happy chappy mostly ignorant of the issues. But I feel rather overwhelmed at the moment, can anyone understand this rant!!:confused:
  2. creativesarah

    creativesarah Registered User

    I can understand perfectly!
    At work I found i couldnt give customers the right change, or remember what I'd gone into the stockroom for rather crucial in a shop
    Driving I'd panic and not know where I was and I find it difficult to multi task so sadly I have given up driving. (and I lost the car on a couple of occassions:eek:)

    Of course there are lots of reasons why people have memory problems including as you rightly said depression, also stress or thyroid problems and lots more besides

    In my case it was discovered I'd had a series of mini strokes TIA'S and I have vascular dementia
    Its not like Alzheimers and there are loads of different types of dementia which is an umbrella term. There are lots of helpful leaflets available on this website as well as helpful people! :)

    I have found coming on Talking Point really helpful people take you seriously and no question is too small. I have found as well as receiving I have been able to help others too

    I hope you get a quick diagnosis, whatever is wrong it seems frightening until you know what you are dealing with

    Best wishes Sarah
  3. DanThe Man

    DanThe Man Registered User

    Nov 16, 2011
    "I can drive no problem "
    I am sorry to point this out, but I think this is unlikely since driving is all about awareness and that's something you say you no longer are.
    A huge step, but I think your driving days should now be considered behind you before you involve others in a potentially serious driving incident.

    Not quite the shoulder to cry upon but I think it needed to be said - as the above reply also commented, they too have realised the car is no longer a viable option.
  4. Margaret W

    Margaret W Registered User

    Apr 28, 2007
    North Derbyshire
    Hello Rinnes.

    How old are you? Are you going through the Menopause? Are you a very busy person? Do you work? What sort of job do you do? How many hours a week does it take up?

    I ask all this because you sound exactly like I did 5 years ago, aged 54. I was working 65 hours a week, all stressful, and although I coped with the job (my entire focus was on it), back at home I could cope with nothing. I lost keys, I lost my phone, I couldn't operate the tap on the wine box, I couldn't find time to speak to anyone on the phone, I dreaded visitors, I couldn't decide what to wear, I couldn't find my shoes, I couldn't do a lot of stuff. It was all stress. I didn't FEEL stressed, I didn't recognise it.

    Then I retired. Wow, did it all disappear!

    I'm not minimising your symptoms, they may be genuinely the commencement of some form of dementia, but they might not be either.

    I suspect your memory tests will be fine. You will know who the prime minister is. You'll be able to count backwards from 100, 7 at a time, you'll be able to draw a circle, and the rest (I'm not giving you any more clues!).

    As for driving, I'm not 100% in agreement with Dan, cos you seem to be very aware on your other problems. So ask yourself if you really are okay with driving (I was, during my stressed out period), and carry on. I get the impression you are the sort of lady who wouldn't drive if she didn't think she was capable. And if you have any doubts, please don't drive.

    Let us know how you get on.

    Of course, these tests are only a guideline. You will really have to just see how life progresses for you. And I hope it progresses well after your worry.


  5. carrie99

    carrie99 Registered User

    Apr 26, 2009
    New to site

    You seem to have a similar situation as I had. I started a new job (hopefully an easy job, but I could not manage a simple job at my new office. I thought it was stress, but then I realised that it was more serious.
    Do use Talking Poubt - it is a lifeline.
    I am also going to be featured on Talking point in the next campagne called "Remember the person."
    So use talking point as much as you want - there many others with whom to discuss it all.
    Good luck!!
  6. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    It`s always good to see you on line carrie. I look forwards to your feature. :)
  7. rinnes23

    rinnes23 Registered User

    Dec 8, 2011
    early days

    Thanks guys, I'm 42 yr old female and work offshore. I have a 11yr old daughter. To be honest I went to my GP on my hubbys insistance as I am driving him insane! I thought it was just years of stress and an addition to my general forgetfullness. I did ask my GP to send me to see a councillor to help work through these problems, however he insisted I saw a nuerologist for a diagnosis and I have to admit to being impatient to get a "stressed diagnosis" so I can get on and deal with it!! However he seems to think I need an MRI scan, I did protest stating I was waisting his time but he got me worried and insisted I went through with the tests as what I was suffering was not "Normal". My blood results were all fine and my mental score only slightly down. I am definately not depressed and don't really feel anxious. I'm not really worried about by forgetfullness as to me I'm just not aware or see it as a big deal but when people around me have noticed and my performance at work is faultering it is a bit of a worry. To be honest I've told all my pals to plan for me being 30mins or more late and I made such a huge effort I actually made it on time one day last week, but it was hard work with lots of planning and post it notes!! I have shares in them I think:D
    As for driving, I don't do much as I am only home for two weeks and live very rural, so tend to let the train take the strain if I go further afield. I live on a single track road with an old Landrover so daudle anyway. Although I forget the fuel and forget the keys etc, there has been no complaints from anyone about my driving skill itself. I think my hubby would soon say if he thought there was an issue there. Both my Dad and Uncle have and had Parkinson's disease the neurologist seemed convinced that there might be a link here but I'll leave that up to him. Feeling better today, as yesterday after seeing the consultant I was so worried about having some form of dementia I panicked however now after reading a heap of things on here I feel much more reassured. Thanks all.
  8. DanThe Man

    DanThe Man Registered User

    Nov 16, 2011
    #8 DanThe Man, Dec 9, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 9, 2011
    The NHS? Do not rely on the first medical person you see nor the GP. If in doubt, pay for a 2nd, 3rd or 4th opinion and follow your gut instinct would be my advice. As you'll see, our own experience is very poor.

    Unconvinced you should be driving. Get an independent to come out with you and let them decide if you are at risk - likley hubby is being diplomatic! My mother did and the ex-police driving instructor gave her some very useful pointers and it gave her enourmous confidence behind the wheel.

    Hope you're having a better day!

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