1. Expert Q&A: Benefits - Weds 23 October, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of benefits. It will be hosted by Lauren from our Knowledge Services team. She'll be answering your questions on Wednesday 23 October between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

  1. Tilly Mac

    Tilly Mac Registered User

    Jun 29, 2015
    3
    Hi my name is Anne I am 61 and I have a beautiful little jack Russell she is 10yrs old, I care for my friend of 18yrs her name is Betty she also has a jack Russell of 4yrs old, Betty is 73 and was diagnosed with demensia 2yrs ago, we used to go every where together the park the beach with our dogs , we would go for meals with some of our other friends all sort of things we would do together, but the last few mouths it has all changed , she walks her dog early in the morning on her own and that's it she won't go out again , I miss her company so much even though I see her every day phone her every Erving to make sure she is ok , she has cares going in three times a day to give her her tablets that I have put in her pill box , I make her sandwiches every day do her ironing, I do theses things as I love her and if it was me in her situation she would be there for me, she has let herself and her home go, I feel lost as I have nobody to talk to who understands what's happening I don't understand sometimes and it's very frustrating, I sit with her and look at the emptiness in her eyes and I want to cry, we talk and the next day will be the same conversation as she will not remember what I said yesterday, I don't mind that or listening to her tell me the same old story of her younger days what I do mind is watching her loose her dignity , I will stop now as I have moaned a lot my story is not bad but I just needed to have some one listern thank you
     
  2. Quilty

    Quilty Registered User

    Aug 28, 2014
    1,056
    GLASGOW
    Hello Friend, I am so sorry that you are having to watch your friend suffer with this terrible disease. It is very hard to see the person you love die a little each day. You are being a very good friend and doing the best you can to support your friend. Other than being there for her and supporting her in a practical way there is very little you can do. She is very lucky to have a friend like you.

    Have you thought of looking on the alzheimers website for a dementia group or cafe that you can go to with your friend? You would both get some support and company, from people who really understand.

    Please keep posting here and we will be here for you. I hope some day I have a friend who loves me as much as you love your friend.
    Love
    Quilty
     
  3. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,826
    UK
    Your story is as significant and just as sad as anyone on here, I hope you can find the strength to carry on caring for your friend, knowing you are with her I'm sure must ease any anxiety she may have. Help and advice always available here.
     
  4. Sue J

    Sue J Registered User

    Dec 9, 2009
    8,041
    Hello Anne,

    Welcome to TP, what a wonderful friend you are to Betty. I hope by joining to TP you can share and get some support as you help your friend with this terrible illness. Everyone here is vey understanding and can also give practical advice on ways to deal with problems you may encounter.

    Best wishes
    Sue:)
     
  5. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,594
    Female
    Dundee
    Hello Tilly and welcome to Talking Point.

    It's so sad to hear that your friend has dementia. I think she is very lucky to have you looking out for her. I know she would have done that for you too. It sounds like you have a very special friendship.

    I also think it might be a good idea to see if there are any drop in Dementia Cafes in your area. If you click on this link you should be able to find your nearest branch of the Alzheimer's Society. They should be able to tell you where the nearest cafe is -

    http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents.php?categoryID=200121
     
  6. Kjn

    Kjn Registered User

    Jul 27, 2013
    5,835
    Welcome to the TP forum Anne .
     

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