1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

  1. Lulu

    Lulu Registered User

    Nov 28, 2004
    391
    Had others before me not have written of their own experiences for me to read and learn from, I wouldn't have as much knowledge and insight as I now do, so I thought it would be worth keeping you updated as we go along. It may help others in the future.

    We shall have our re-assessment from SS next week, but Mum is already booked in for half a days trial daycare next week which, combined with other things now happening, should start to find some sort of routine to the week. She is being offered, at least as far as we know, something called 'enhanced daycare', which I feel is the right thing for her. Have you heard of this?

    I know that this is the right thing to do, since she has very little initiative left, and I just cannot do everything for her, as much as I'd like to. There is no doubt that she goes rapidly downhill if left to her own devices for too long, including, I believe, the mysterious headaches. I have now tried diversionary tactics this week, and whilst the headache is ever present, it never incapacitates her as it had been doing so long as she is occupied. So having daycare must be the right thing, I know.

    However, just as I had feelings of dread sending her off for an afternoon's 'social' once a week, (which she loves), I am REALLY dreading seeing her go off to a Day Centre. It is an awful moment. I know that is is for her benefit, but so far she has no idea what I am planning and I hate doing it to her. Even now, she is still looking, sounding very 'normal', the family still unbelieving of her condition. Can this be so? Can we have reached this stage and for her to be struggling so much day to day, and yet still seem 'normal' ?

    Yours, confused as ever. Lulu
     
  2. Lynne

    Lynne Registered User

    Jun 3, 2005
    3,433
    Suffolk,England
    I know what you mean,

    ... about looking & sounding so 'normal'. From a few casual sentences of conversation with neighbours, or on a phone call with my brother (in Australia), she's bright & breezy, wearing her 'public' face. It's not until someone from 'outside' spends a whole day with my Mum that they begin to see the tell-tale signs and, like you, I sometimes doubt myself and wonder if it's ME that needs an assessment.

    Anyway, you seem to have made some progress with her afternoon Social Circle working out OK, and perhaps de-stressing you both a little for a few hours.
    Think Positive; the Enhanced Daycare is quite likely to go well too, now you've broken the ice & got her interested in the afternoon one. If you're feeling apprehensive or negative about it, Mum might pick up on that & get jittery herself, so think positive. And 'enhanced'? Could you phone & find out?

    Good luck
     
  3. Lulu

    Lulu Registered User

    Nov 28, 2004
    391
    Thanks, Lynne. Yes, I wonder too if I am the one on need of an assessment. That's reassuring!

    As for the impending dread feeling re starting daycare, it is only here that I am expressing my doubts/fears, since to Mum I am bright, breezy and matter of fact. Only when alone do I collapse into this heap!
     

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