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New member

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
285
hiya angielou must be a bit daunting to be the new member posting but i dont bite and we all support each other on the forum noit always sad or scary but can bring a smile to my face. hope you can post soon
 

Angielou

Registered User
Jun 4, 2020
15
I might have made a mistake in my very first post. My husband was diagnosed with early onset dementia 3 years ago. He has difficulty principally with language (reading writing and speaking). Well - the list goes on as I am sure you all understand. We have a primary school age child and I work part time. Is there anyone out there in a similar situation? I can find keeping everything together quite overwhelming.
 

nae sporran

Volunteer Host
Oct 29, 2014
6,933
Bristol
Welcome to the forums @Angielou. I can't imagine how hard ti is to juggle caring for your husband and looking after your children at the same time must be. Conact you local social services for a care needs assessment and a cares assessment to find what help and support is available if you have not already had those.
There are many members who will identify with your situation, so you will find answers and support here.
 

Bunpoots

Volunteer Host
Apr 1, 2016
4,520
Nottinghamshire
Welcome from me too @Angielou

You’ve certainly got your work cut out for you! We have had other members with children still living at home with a PWD and I know how difficult it can be to manage both generations. Keep posting - you’ll find support and understanding here.
 

Angielou

Registered User
Jun 4, 2020
15
I'd still haven't got the hang of these threads. Lockdown hasn't been good for focussing the mind. I've just started back to work an(I'm a teacher) and my son went in to his local school. We live in Scotland so teachers are back to reorganize for next year. I felt really anxious having to discuss my husband's condition with the school but it had to be done. Anyone out there find it hard to talk to people outside family/friends circle about dementia. It's so individual and people have their own ideas of what it is.
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
62,075
69
Dundee
I am no longer caring for someone as my husband died coming up for 4 years ago. Your post struck a chord with me though @Angielou. I was working full time as a primary school had teacher when my husband was diagnosed in 2001. I didn’t tell anyone at the school for a long time. Eventually it became necessary to tell my boss and the members of staff who worked closely with me. At the beginning I did find it really, really hard to talk to people at work about it all. Gradually I let more and more people know and found nothing but understanding - I still didn’t really like to talk about it though. That’s the beauty of this forum - you can talk away here and there’s always someone to listen.

Although it was hard for me it must be so much harder for you having a child in the family as well - we didn’t have children.

Wishing you strength.
 

RosettaT

Registered User
Sep 9, 2018
489
Mid Lincs
Hi @Angielou, welcome ot TDP.
I found it difficult to tell people my OHs diagnosis, it wasn't until he was admitted to hospital that I did & it was a year before I told my sister and we are really close, because her OH had just been diagnosed with liver cancer.
It was the hardest 18 months of my life. I was at a complete loss and literally on my own. But far from our close friends judging they were very supportive.
I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you and my advice is seek as much help as you can.
Keep posting here, rant if you need to, everyone understands.
 

jaymor

Volunteer Moderator
Jul 14, 2006
13,003
England
Hi @Angielou and welcome from me too.

My husband was 62 when he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. He was able to continue to work. He ran an electrical contracting business and although he had his team of workers from time to time he loved to put his tool belt on and Have a day working along side of them.

I felt it was important that they knew he had dementia. I wanted them to know when he acted out of character that it was the dementia and not him being awkward or unreasonable. There was also the thought that there might be a time when working himself might cause a problem. Electricity needs to be respected, it can kill. I wanted them to just make sure his work was ok.

It worked out fine, they watched him without him knowing and with their help and lots of notepads he continued enjoying going to work. It helped his self esteem and he managed for nearly four years. For us it was good, there was so much understanding from those we told.
 

Angielou

Registered User
Jun 4, 2020
15
I am no longer caring for someone as my husband died coming up for 4 years ago. Your post struck a chord with me though @Angielou. I was working full time as a primary school had teacher when my husband was diagnosed in 2001. I didn’t tell anyone at the school for a long time. Eventually it became necessary to tell my boss and the members of staff who worked closely with me. At the beginning I did find it really, really hard to talk to people at work about it all. Gradually I let more and more people know and found nothing but understanding - I still didn’t really like to talk about it though. That’s the beauty of this forum - you can talk away here and there’s always someone to listen.

Although it was hard for me it must be so much harder for you having a child in the family as well - we didn’t have children.

Wishing you strength.
Thank you. That really helped me feel less alne