New member after advice

[nse]

All, thanks for the help you have already given me whilst I have been visiting this site.
I have now registered and am after some general advice:
My father has vascular dementia and is well supported by my mom and myself and neighbours. He is 79, recently scored 18 on the MMSE and is on 5mg Memantine. He is alert, aware and as ever adorable and very much loved. Physically he can get around but is slowing.
The advice I see is around the bigger picture as the doctors seem reluctant to predict the future.
I am merely trying to plan for things and would appreciate some experiences of:
- What next and what timescales
- How long before we need to think about nursing home etc
- How does my mom stand financially with regards to getting dad in nursing home
- I have seen it mentioned that 5 to 6 years is about the time from start to end...any comments

Thanks in anticipation

 

[Amy]

Hiya nse,
Start to end? Pick a number, any number. My mum showed early signs 15 years ago - she also has vascular dementia. Progress? Things will get worse, but you may not seen any change for a while, then a deterioration maybe followed by a slight improvement. The decline from vascular dementia is normally described aas a stepped progression.
Have you had a look at the factsheets (see top left corner of page) - I think you will find some useful information.
Welcome to TP.
Love, Helen

 

[Brucie]

Hi nse, and welcome to TP

you ask some interesting questions and if only we could ever really know the answers!

What next and what timescales

it really depends on the person what happens next and how soon. Vasular dementia is stroke induced, so when a person has a stroke, the condition generally gets worse. Sometimes they seem better for a day or so, which is confusing for us, but that is the body pushing extra resources in at a time of stress. Once this has been done, the body will stand back again, and the decline will continue.

- How long before we need to think about nursing home etc

thinking about one - do it now. Let the [unthinkable] idea settle in your head. Perhaps check out what is available locally, and the cost implications. But don't consider his moving to a home until circumstances are such that care at a nursing home is the best choice - for him, or even for the family if they truly can't cope.

How does my mom stand financially with regards to getting dad in nursing home

it is all a bit postcode dependent, and also it depends on the condition of the patient. Others on TP will be able to advise better.....

- I have seen it mentioned that 5 to 6 years is about the time from start to end...any comments

yes, my comments are that it could be 5 to 6 minutes, 5 to 6 years, 10-12 years, depending on the health, age and condition of the person, also on the frequency of strokes. Really, there is no way of knowing for sure.

Take each day as it comes and deal with it.

Best wishes

 

[nse]

Thanks Helen,

Taking the old boy for a pint tonight.... he loves that even if he only manages 1/2 these days.

 

[Brucie]

absolutely the correct thing to do!

if he enjoys it then let him do it, so long as it is not harmful for him or others.

 

[nse]

Thanks

Helen and Brucie thanks both for your replies. Every day is different and uncertain. this little community is very supportive and it is scarey how many people are going through similar.....Thanks again, Rob

 

[BonnieRose]

choices in care

Hi nse, You have asked exactly the same questions I wanted to know when I first joined. My mum was diagnoised about 18 months ago and is struggling to cope on her own now. I realise everyone is different and that makes it difficult to plan. I need to find out about funding of care homes too, is there a webb site which explains how it all works? Does anyone know? Regards remus.

 

[magpie]

New too - questions and care

Hi
I'm new too, today, though I've been visiting awhile. I've researched the same questions and got the same open ended answers. Really I know I should act on lots of stuff but I don't want this to be happening to Mum so I'm dragging my feet...trying not to tempt fate eh? But hearing others with the same problems and dealing with it is good - so one decision made at least, to join in.

Re Care Homes: I found a good guide at www.counselandcare.org.uk

Cheers