Hi, I've just got back from visiting my mum as she has been admitted to hospital and I am very scared and upset. I feel very angry at the moment because my mum was supposed to be being looked after in the care home.
I went to visit her last Monday and was shocked to see that she'd lost even more weight. I came home that night and got a call Tuesday morning that mum had been admitted to hospital because they were "concerned". I had mentioned to the "nurse" at the home when I was there that I was worried mum was likely to be dehydrated because of her lack of food and drink intake. He disagreed and said "no your mum is not dehydrated, we can tell by pinching her skin" They had also said they called a doctor in on several occasions to check mum over and he said she was fine, there was nothing to be concerned about it was just the normal progression of the AD and parkinsons.
We went to visit mum in hospital over the weekend (just got back - it's in Manchester, we're in Essex) and she has been on a constant saline drip for SEVERE dehydration, she has had to have THREE blood transfusions, she is anaemic, has had a high temperature, on the highest strength anti-biotics for an infection and they have also found gall-stones and has a cloud over her liver. She has been crying for a long time at the home now - clearly and obviously in pain but hasn't been able to tell us and they told us she was fine. The home still insist she was not dehydrated!! Her stomach is extremely bloated - like malnutrition. I'm in bits. We had to come home to sort a few things out but are going back up this week cos I just want to be with her. They have said they couldn't operate on her because she is too weak.
I'm so scared and upset. Me and my sister feel we are to blame for moving her to the home. Ever since she's gone there she's gone downhill. I can't cope with the guilt. A couple of months ago when she could still speak she was begging us to help her but couldn't tell us what was wrong. I feel so upset that she's been in all this pain for all this time and no-one has helped her. She mentioned her stomach ache a long time ago and we told the home and they said there was nothing wrong. I feel they put everything down to the dementia - that she was crying because of that but really she was crying cos of the pain.
I feel like I will never be able to forgive myself for allowing my mum to go there. I can't go on. I can't handle seeing what this disease has done to my mum. She's only 53. I hate it so much and feel so angry and bitter. I don't see the point in anything anymore and hate everything.
I don't know what to do. I feel angry with the home at not admitting her sooner when she wasn't eating and I feel angry with myself and that it's my fault. If she'd have still been here it wouldn't have come to this!!!!!!!!!!
I went to visit her last Monday and was shocked to see that she'd lost even more weight. I came home that night and got a call Tuesday morning that mum had been admitted to hospital because they were "concerned". I had mentioned to the "nurse" at the home when I was there that I was worried mum was likely to be dehydrated because of her lack of food and drink intake. He disagreed and said "no your mum is not dehydrated, we can tell by pinching her skin" They had also said they called a doctor in on several occasions to check mum over and he said she was fine, there was nothing to be concerned about it was just the normal progression of the AD and parkinsons.
We went to visit mum in hospital over the weekend (just got back - it's in Manchester, we're in Essex) and she has been on a constant saline drip for SEVERE dehydration, she has had to have THREE blood transfusions, she is anaemic, has had a high temperature, on the highest strength anti-biotics for an infection and they have also found gall-stones and has a cloud over her liver. She has been crying for a long time at the home now - clearly and obviously in pain but hasn't been able to tell us and they told us she was fine. The home still insist she was not dehydrated!! Her stomach is extremely bloated - like malnutrition. I'm in bits. We had to come home to sort a few things out but are going back up this week cos I just want to be with her. They have said they couldn't operate on her because she is too weak.
I'm so scared and upset. Me and my sister feel we are to blame for moving her to the home. Ever since she's gone there she's gone downhill. I can't cope with the guilt. A couple of months ago when she could still speak she was begging us to help her but couldn't tell us what was wrong. I feel so upset that she's been in all this pain for all this time and no-one has helped her. She mentioned her stomach ache a long time ago and we told the home and they said there was nothing wrong. I feel they put everything down to the dementia - that she was crying because of that but really she was crying cos of the pain.
I feel like I will never be able to forgive myself for allowing my mum to go there. I can't go on. I can't handle seeing what this disease has done to my mum. She's only 53. I hate it so much and feel so angry and bitter. I don't see the point in anything anymore and hate everything.
I don't know what to do. I feel angry with the home at not admitting her sooner when she wasn't eating and I feel angry with myself and that it's my fault. If she'd have still been here it wouldn't have come to this!!!!!!!!!!
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