Hi I am in a horrible state at the moment. I have been full time carer for my mum for last few years, she lives with me, it’s just the two of us living together after my partner passed away 2yrs ago with cancer, I recently had a holiday for a week but returned to chaos. My sister who is very resentful of me going away has helped make life hell. Things were coming to a head before I took my holiday but have got so much worse since coming home. It’s too long a story to write here but mum now wants to try residential care and would barely talk to me when I got home, before I went she demanded I didn’t arrange “babysitters” for her so talked through how to manage, my sister refused to help while I was away although I knew she wouldn’t leave mum alone once I’d gone plus my 2brothers Live fairly near. I also informed neighbours I would be away. I really needed the break as I have been heading for my own problems, before I left I could hardly eat or sleep, I lost a lot of weight and seemed to be walking into eating disorder, I suffer with restless leg syndrome which means sleep is difficult plus when I had some nights without this problem I still couldn’t sleep well. My anxiety is sky high and I feel I’m not in control of my emotions, I am in touch with GP but get too upset to explain things properly. During lockdown mum told me and others she felt more settled and relaxed than ever before and loved our home. I returned to accusations I don’t look after her properly, I give out of date food, I’ve stolen some of her money and only think of myself, I am devastated and have asked social services for respite care and to give mum a trial in residential care, I’m told it’s a long process and waiting lists but I can’t cope anymore, my sister and her husband resent me and won’t even talk or acknowledge me when they visit once a week but mum blames me for that even though I’ve pleaded with my sister to at least say hello for mums sake, she refuses. Im afraid I’m at breaking point and although control emotions well I seem to be crying or shouting and hate myself for it, for the first in my life I shouted at mum. I don’t know what to do next