Need Advice Please


Registered User
Jul 9, 2006
Hi first time on this forum, just been to see my mum in her care home she is 65 and has deen diagnosed with vascular dementia for 4 years, she now seems to be having accidents she has been found lying on the heating pipes in her room and burning herself one time very badly she spent 5 days in hospital which was only a couple of weeks ago, she now has a black eye where the home tell me she fell out of bed, Is this common? She cant tell you whats happening and she doesnt seem to feel pain.
All the so called experts kept telling me once she reaches 65 all these magic things will happen for her seems to me since turning 65 she has just went downhill.
any advice will be most welcome.



Registered User
Jan 4, 2006
Hiya Erint01,
Welcome to TP. Sorry that your mum is having such a bad time at the moment.
How satisfied are you with the care generally in the home? What are they doing to ensure that these accidents cannot happen again? I would presume that the heating pipes have now been concealed so that your mum cannot come into contact with them again. Does she regularly fall out of bed? I know that accidents do happen. With my mum we several times found her asleep on the floor next to her bed. We could never work out if she had rolled out, or sat on the edge of the bed and then fallen. What did your mum hit her face on to cause a black eye? One black eye is unlikely to be caused just by hitting the floor. Having read on another thread that falling over often accompanies UTI's, has your mum been checked out for an infection?
You are your mum's voice, you must ask questions of the Care Home on her behalf, to ensure that she is kept safe.


Registered User
Mar 13, 2006
hi erin01

my mums not in a home but has had a few long stays in the emi unit at the hospital, whilst there theyve had to have the doctor to her 3 times due to falling, she knocked her head, she had a suspected cracked hip bone, and a badly bruised back, she's constantly covered in bruises but nobody seems to know how she gets them, its usually shes fallen out of bed or she keeps putting herself on the floor, ive noticed a lot of other older patients (my mums also 65) with bruising since then so whether it is a dementia related thing i dont know, i do know that uti's as amy pointed out makes her unsteady as she's just recovered from another one so its worth checking that out.
make sure the home know that your aware of the accidents your mum keeps having do they have an accident book in which they keep a record of things that happen to your mum,
keep us informed of any progress you make,
take care x


Registered User
May 14, 2006

My Mum has Vascular Dementia too and last year she had a number of falls in her own home. She didn't know how they happened, but watching her at other times, it seemed like her legs just gave way. Also getting up too quickly can make the elderly feel light headed. After a couple of falls involving the ambulance service, Mum went into a Care Home where she was happy and well looked after. She fell in her room- nobody was to blame, and broke her hip, ending up in a NH.
In hospital she kept trying to climb out of bed and she jumped out of bed in the NH, despite the safety rails. She kept moving off her chair and on to the floor and fell several times. Mum isn't mobile now, she just sits in her chair and needs a wheelchair. I don't think anyone was to blame for any of her falls. She was just trying to escape and go home to her Mum and Dad. I did notice that she was becoming very uncoordinated and seemed to be unsure of where to put her feet when these falls started.


Registered User
Jul 9, 2006
thank you

Thanks very much for all your replys, Im am trying to get a meeting with the care home manager to find out what they intend to do in the mean time im buying a safety rail which is used for children when they move from cots to beds to see if that will help with the falling out of bed, I dont know what to do about heating pipes the home have put lagging on them then cover them with quilts but the last time she pulled the lagging off and lay on top of the pipes (what the home told me not my mum) At the moment i feel as though the home cant be bothered with her she looks dirty and is very rarely dressed properly.
Sometimes i feel as if the staff treat me like a child as im only 36 and have never had any experience of this sort, i want to shout and ask akward questions but i feel if i do the care mum gets could be compromised.


Registered User
The care home should pay for those rails that you are going to by.

If I was you I would write all the question, issue I wanted answered on a paper then when you go in to meet the manger you have it all clearly written down. Dose your mum have a social worker? Could you not ask social worker to come along with you to the meeting with the manger?

Or if not take a good friend with you or a close member of your family if you don’t have anyone don't let manger intimidate you or yourself in thinking
that just because your complaining in the care your mother getting its going to come back on your mother, that’s why we have social workers to make sure that your mother gets the best care she deserve .

If you don’t have a social worker for your mum you should ask for one


Registered User
Mar 23, 2005
Hi erint01,

Sorry to hear that your mother has had such a difficult time lately. Does her care home specialise in the care of people with dementia? The pipe "solution" does not sound like one that has been designed to cope with the ingenious and unpredictable ways of people with dementia.

I would be very cautious about fitting bed rails without professional advice. There have been reported a number of cases of elderly and confused people accidentally injuring themselves on poorly fitted rails. A recent article (American in this case) can be found here:

It might be interesting to read the inspection reports for your mother's home. You can get them via the Commission for Social Care Inpsection's web site:

Take care,


Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Care Homes

Hi Erint01
I am so sorry you are having to worry about your mother`s care.

My mother was in a Care Home for 6 years. She kept falling and the cause was given as Mini strokes. One day she had a carpet burn on her cheek. I`m not sure how long she must have been on the floor to get a carpet burn and was too afraid to ask, in case the staff `took it out` on her. Yes. That`s how I felt.

One day I went to visit [I always went at different times] and she was strapped in a chair. To be honest, It wouldn`t have bothered me as, with her history of falling, it could have been to keep her safe, after all we strap babies in don`t we. However, when I arrived and approached my mother, a member of staff, very flustered, ran over and untied the strap saying she hadn`t been strapped in long.

This was a home on the list of recommended homes, given to me by the Social Worker, so I was led to believe it was OK. Following this incident, I wrote to Social Services and itemised all my concerns. There followed visits and inspections and things did improve.

I lost faith in this home and after searching, managed to move my mother to a better home where I was never given cause for concern.

I`m dreading the time when I`ll be forced to consider a care home for my husband. I can cope now, but when he needs more physical care, I`m going to have to get help from somewhere. Meanwhile, I just take each day as it comes.

Try to get to the bottom of this Erint01, for your own peace of mind as much as anything, as well as the benefit of your mother.

Take Care Grannie G


Registered User
Jan 29, 2006
Hi erint01

Sorry to hear about your mum. Is your mum falling out of bed onto the pipes? I just wondered as when I first started to look after my mum who has AD after my father died, there was quite a few occasions at first where I found mum on the floor having fallen out of bed. At the time she was in a double bed that was quite high up so I moved her into a single bed which is a lot lower down and I bought a single size fleece blanket from argos that I put on the bed under her quilt the wrong way round. What that means is that it tucks in tightly a long way either side so it would be very difficult for her to fall out now, and it has worked extremely well as she has fallen out of bed for 14 months! Perhaps this would be work better than the childs safety rail for your mum.

Regarding the falls, my mum had falls where she just suddenly fell to the ground, it didn't happen very often but it has been much less frequent (in fact hardly at all) since she was taken off the medication she had for her blood pressure.

I hope you manage to get to the bottom of this with the care home.