i don't know why i'm posting this here but here goes
my nan passed away on the 24th of june 2008 two days ago she had vascular dementia and sufferd the most horrific death i could imagine her mind was robbed of all it was and i could do nothing to help her i loved my nan alot, Two months ago she was taken into hospital she was not eating or drinking and she had a stroke she "recoverd" in hospital enough to talk again and in the end forgot everyone even her twin sister and her daughter but she remeberd me and i dont know why. one month ago in hospital she asked to leave she did not know where she wanted to go so i asked if she would like me to find a home where she would be taken care of, she cried with happiness and said thank you.
On the 10th of june she fell asleep and only ever breifly opened her eyes and spoke but every time she would only remember me and smile at me she even once told me she loved me.
During this time i had been to 20 or 30 nursing homes before deciding on one and after lenghthy arguments we managed to get her into it.
She went on the morninng of the 23rd of june and she slept through the transfer there later that day i whisperd to her that i had kept my promise and got her into a nice home and she woke up and smiled at me and looked around,
we had already put her pictures and things around her and i swear although at this point she could not speak i heard her say "thank you" she fell asleep again soon after so we thought we would let her rest for the night.
On the morning of the 24th of june i recived a call at work from the nursing home my nan had passed away that morning in her sleep...
I cant help feeling that moving her made this happen and i feel so much guilt.
its been two days and i dont know what to do i have too much time on my hands i should be looking after nan feeding her or talking to her or cleaning her instead i have nothing
nan i miss you so much i hope i did all i could for you
my nan passed away on the 24th of june 2008 two days ago she had vascular dementia and sufferd the most horrific death i could imagine her mind was robbed of all it was and i could do nothing to help her i loved my nan alot, Two months ago she was taken into hospital she was not eating or drinking and she had a stroke she "recoverd" in hospital enough to talk again and in the end forgot everyone even her twin sister and her daughter but she remeberd me and i dont know why. one month ago in hospital she asked to leave she did not know where she wanted to go so i asked if she would like me to find a home where she would be taken care of, she cried with happiness and said thank you.
On the 10th of june she fell asleep and only ever breifly opened her eyes and spoke but every time she would only remember me and smile at me she even once told me she loved me.
During this time i had been to 20 or 30 nursing homes before deciding on one and after lenghthy arguments we managed to get her into it.
She went on the morninng of the 23rd of june and she slept through the transfer there later that day i whisperd to her that i had kept my promise and got her into a nice home and she woke up and smiled at me and looked around,
we had already put her pictures and things around her and i swear although at this point she could not speak i heard her say "thank you" she fell asleep again soon after so we thought we would let her rest for the night.
On the morning of the 24th of june i recived a call at work from the nursing home my nan had passed away that morning in her sleep...
I cant help feeling that moving her made this happen and i feel so much guilt.
its been two days and i dont know what to do i have too much time on my hands i should be looking after nan feeding her or talking to her or cleaning her instead i have nothing
nan i miss you so much i hope i did all i could for you