1. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    #1 Mother goose, Jan 25, 2015
    Last edited: Jan 25, 2015
    I didn't get to put a title on here.
    My mum's been in NH 6 wks & I've mentioned on here previously that she would stay in bed for 17 or more hrs in the day & refuse to get up & eat or drink. Was also putting herself at risk of danger, climbing on chair to try & change light bulb & blowing the fuse & leaving frying pan on & walking away etc. I'm so relieved she's now safe in NH & is like a different person in there.

    Gets up in morn eats all her meals & when I visit, she's walking around & thankfully getting exercise by doing so. Never goes back to bed until bedtime. Yest I got a call from a nurse to say my mum's not well & they've put her in bed. She said, it's nothing to worry about, but just wanted to let me know. Told me, she was eating her dinner, went pale & got sick, so they lay her down & her blood pressure was low.

    I went in & she was in bed asleep & seemed very drowsy, opening her eyes & then back to sleep. Nurse said blood pressure had gone back to normal when I got there. I had mentioned to another nurse day before, that my mum had swollen calves & her blood pressure was checked then & said normal. I told nurse yest, about her ankles & she said that was retention of water. While my mum was sleeping I checked her wardrobe to make sure she had clean clothes. I could smell a strong smell of urine & found pajama trousers my mum had put back in drawer & were soaking wet with urine. I told the nurse & asked if was a uti, said possibly & she'd check her urine later. We don't go out very much, but had tickets for the theatre last night that we'd booked a few months ago. We did go out, but I was so worried & kept checking my phone & thankfully the NH didn't ring me, so I felt reassured that she was ok.

    I am going in to see her today & really hope she is much better & that maybe it was just a bug. I feel it could be a uti though & feel I've diagnosed her myself, but they know best & I'll talk to the nurses when I go in.

    As I know how my mum was like before going in NH, it was amazing when the nurses & carers said, it's not like Joan to be in bed or not eating, as she likes her food & is always active here. They will never see the other side of my mum, as she is so different with outsiders. But on the other hand, I'm so glad she is different in there as she looks so much better, than she did, apart from yesterday. More importantly, I know she is safe there, as if that had happened when she was living on her own, she wouldn't have told me & I would have only found out when looking for her dirty washing.
     
  2. angecmc

    angecmc Registered User

    Dec 25, 2012
    2,108
    hertfordshire
    Glad to hear your Mum has settled in her nursing home, hope she is better today xx

    Ange
     
  3. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,735
    Kent
    Mother Goose

    If a really good home is found, often the health and well being of the person needing care improves tenfold.

    The same happened with my husband. He didn`t live alone, he received 24/7 care from me and agency carers. However once in the home , his appetite improved and so did his general well being.

    He often told me he was lonely even if I was with him all the time. In the home, the coming and going of staff and visitors agreed with him, as did the often silent companionship of other residents.

    It`s the luck of the draw I`m afraid but I can see you are as thankful it is working for your mum as I was when it worked for my husband.
     
  4. susy

    susy Registered User

    Jul 29, 2013
    801
    North East
    Glad your mum is settled. From what you are saying it sounds like she might have an underlying illness somewhere going on. If not she may need her medication checking by a dr. It sounds like she had what is called a vaso vagal attack. That often occurs when you have eaten a meal. Basically the blood in your body goes to the internal organs as normal after eating but as it doesn't so for some reason it drops it's pressure so you faint. You feel hot and sweaty the clod and clammy shortly afterwards and are often sick. Not a nice thing to happen at all.
    I hope the nurses and drs get to the route cause of what's going on and she feels much better soon.
     
  5. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    #5 Mother goose, Jan 25, 2015
    Last edited: Jan 25, 2015
    Thank you all for your replies.
    I went into my mum this morn & she was very sleepy & said she felt shattered. She'd been walking around & was in a chair when I arrived. She was holding her forehead & said it felt like she couldn't hold her head up & looked very pale. I checked her wardrobe for dirty clothes & found another pair of pyjama bottoms wet with urine. I mentioned it to the Nurse & she said, they tested her urine yest & was normal. I'm still concerned it could be a kidney infection, I wonder can you still have an inf if urine normal with the dip stick? She also started coughing yest & again today.

    I was so worried that I went back into see her again this aftn with my daughter & they had put her back to bed. Again she was going in & out of being sleepy & still looks very pale. Was rubbing her tummy, said it felt uncomfortable. I checked her calves & her socks had made tight marks on her lower legs & her calves were bulging over the socks. As she has alzheimers, she didn't seem to realise her legs were uncomfortable. I took the socks off & put soft looser ones on & she said, that was much better. After a while the tight marks were disappearing.

    I said to the nurse, should she see a Dr, she said they could'nt do anything, as her blood pressure was normal again & all her other observations. She said the swollen ankles would be caused by the blood pressure. The GP goes into the NH on a mon & tues, so I'll go back in again & hopefully I can get to see her. The Nurse said maybe as she was sick yest, she's just tired from that. To me & my daughter, it seems a different sort of being tired & she looks unwell. Incontinence was mentioned, but would that not start gradually & not soaking wet the 1st time. I'd be grateful for any advice please.
     
  6. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    Thank you so much for your advice, Piph.
    I am very worried about my mum, I've even got my clothes out ready in case I get a call in the night. If the GP agrees with the staff, that I don't know what else to do.
    My mum is unwell & to me it's not normal to have soaking wet pjs & be so sleepy.
    I hope I can find out more tomorrow.

    Have to say when I saw her this morn, I got very upset. The nurse took her into the dining room to see if she'd eat anything & I felt so emotional saying goodbye to her, I was in tears. She has been difficult at times & if my husband or myself asked her not to do something, she would do the complete opposite. But at the end of the day, she's still my mum & I care about her & would do anything for her.

    We did everything for her before she went into NH, but I didn't think about when she'd become unwell, especially as she is 85 & apart from alzheimers, she's physically fit. I didn't realise how hard & emotional it would be to deal with, as the alzheimers is hard enough.
















    during their visit. If you can be there as well, then you can put your thoughts to him/her, which may be vastly different to the CH staff's. Insist that she has a thorough check-up and try t get a urine sample for the GP to send off for testing. Dip-stick testing is all very well, but only for initial diagnoses - it needs testing properly in a lab for a proper diagnosis.[/QUOTE]
     
  7. Louby65

    Louby65 Registered User

    Mar 26, 2014
    619
    Scotland
    Hello mother goose . I'm so sorry to hear that your mum isn't well . I live with my mum who has vascular dementia and hasn't been too well but i have managed to get her better the past few weeks . I am a nurse so I am very concerned about your mums well being ( as are you) . The sleepiness , incontinence and lack of appetite requires immediate attention , not being dismissed by nursing home staff . You are perfectly entitled to politely demand that your mum is seen by a doctor tonight. I know I would . ' Dipping urine' is not a robust way of declaring that an infection is there , a sample must be sent to microbiology for investigation and then commenced on appropriate treatment if indeed , if she has a uti . It could be something entirely different which I do not want to frighten you about . However , I will say your mum requires attention now, not when it suits the care home. I wish you and your mum well and hoe she gets better soon.


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  8. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    Thank you Louby65, for your very helpful advice.
    Both my daughter & myself, are convinced my mum has a kidney infection. She just doesn't look right at all. I'm hoping if it's a uti, then it can be treated with antibiotics. If it isn't, you said it could be something entirely different. What else do you think it could be?

    I am worried about her & as I mentioned on here before my daughter gets headaches every day for the last yr. She's waiting for results of an MRI scan, which we're hoping will be normal. Then the Dr still needs to find out the cause & hopefully can give her treatment.

    Her husband had a bad car accident the other week when we had snow & ice. His car skidded, turned over & landed on its roof upside down, 6 feet in a ditch & thank god he got out ok & no injuries. They have 2 young children 1 & 5, who thankfully weren't in the car, as it has been written off. So I worry about them so much too, as well as my mum & my 2 sons & their families in England.

    I have sjogrens syndrome an immune condition, you may have heard of it & stress makes my symptoms worse. Last night I was still awake at 2 am & ended up going in the spare room. Tonight I have our 2 little grandchildren staying over for a sleepover, so my daughter & her husband can have a break after their trauma & worries in last few months. I know I won't sleep properly tonight, in case the baby wakes up. I love having them to stay & spending time with them, so I don't mind being woken up.
     
  9. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    I rang my mum's nursing home 10.30 this morn, to see how she was & told she slept ok & still in bed asleep. Nurse said they'd asked GP to go in & check her over, as she was still sleepy, so I was pleased they had listened to me yest, when I asked if she should been seen. She didnt know when it would be, so I decided to go in at lunchtime. As I was driving & only 5 mins away nurse rang & said GP on her way. I was glad I'd be there to talk to her, as I am very worried about my mum. Nurse said, GP wants to do blood tests & would I take them to the hospital & I agreed.

    GP was there when I arrived & had examined my mum & taken her bloods. My mum was sitting in a chair & kept going to sleep. GP said, she seems drowsy, I said she's been like that last 3/4 days. I asked could it be a uti, as I mentioned I'd found soaking wet PJ bottoms & wet knickers hidden in my mum's wardrobe. She asked was that new since she'd been in NH & how long going on. I said yes, as since being in there she has become more alert as eating & sleeping properly, until last 3/4 days. Nurse didn't tell her that or that she was so drowsy. Nurse said, she'd checked her urine on sat & was normal. I said, if I'm taking the bloods to the hospital, could I take a urine sample too. GP agreed & the nurse dealt with my mum & got a sample.

    She's on a lot of medication, for alzheimers including antidepressant, blood pressure tablets & cholesterol. GP suggested to the nurse to stop one of them, a relaxant & makes you drowsy. I spoke to the nurse after & said, my mum's been on that tablet a long while, so I assumed it couldn't suddenly make her drowsy. The nurse then informed me, that there was blood in the urine & GP going to start my mum on antibiotics.

    I'm so glad something is now being done to help my mum, I know she is one of 60 residents, but so many people there have said to me, your mum's walking around all the time & then suddenly a few days ago, so sleepy. Even 2 of the elderly residents spoke to me & asked how she was & should'nt she be seeing a Dr.
    I'm really pleased with the nursing home, it's a lovely place, home made cooking & plenty of activities. But I just feel, if I hadn't been there today with the GP, she wouldn't have known that my mum has been sleepy for several days & obviously wetting herself. Also that a urine sample wouldn't have been sent away. I was also amazed that I was asked to take the bloods & urine sample to the hospital. As it was for my mum of course I'd do it, but the hospital isn't up the road. It's a 45 min drive each way, then having to find a space in the very full car park.

    If I hadnt mentioned to the nurse, that my mum's been on that tablet a long while, she would'nt have told me there was blood in the urine & started on antibiotics. I never complain or be rude to anyone & I always try to be friendly & chat to everyone at the home, staff & residents. But I feel if my mum has got a uti, should I talk to the staff in charge. If there is blood in the urine, does it mean it is an infection? I obviously can't say anything until I know the results. I had my 2 little grandchildren over night last night, so my daughter & her husband could have a break, as they're going through a lot. The baby woke up several times in the night & I feel so tired today, with also worrying about my mum's health.
     
  10. susy

    susy Registered User

    Jul 29, 2013
    801
    North East
    It certainly could mean there is an infection.
    I'm glad you were there for your mum today. I'm guessing in future if there is any doubt you will be make sure the nurses give the GP a letter you write with all of your concerns.
    Hope mum gets better soon xxx
     
  11. Gigglemore

    Gigglemore Registered User

    Oct 18, 2013
    526
    British Isles
    Hope the results come through soon and that your mum gets any treatment she needs. You have done so well looking out for her and speaking up for her, after all you are the person who knows her best.

    Do hope the worry isn't affecting you too badly and that you get more rest tonight.
     
  12. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    Thank you, Susy.
    Yes, I will definitely make sure I get the nurse to tell the GP everything, if my mum is unwell again. It shouldn't be up to the family, to have to deal with it.
     
  13. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    Thank you, Gigglemore.
    I surprised myself today, when I stood up for my mum. I'm not one for speaking out, as I am quite shy. But seeing my mum so drowsy the last 3 to 4 days & the nurse saying to me, she's probably tired after being sick the day before & there's no harm in having a snooze.

    It's obvious to me, that it can't be normal to be sitting in a chair & not able to keep your eyes open. I felt I had to speak up for my mum, as she just sat there & said she was ok.
     
  14. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    I went into see my mum this morn & one of the nurses said she was in bed as still tired. Told me the antibiotics for her kidney infection will start to take effect very soon. She took me to my mum's room & I was delighted to see her sitting up & eating toast. She looked so much better than the last few days. I have to say the worry of seeing her look so unwell the last 3 days really affected me. I said to her, I was really worried about you. She said oh were you, thank you. I told her that she was very sleepy & did she wonder why. Just said no & it obviously didn't affect her at all & sadly as she was out of it, it didn't worry her. When I think how worried I was about her, even to saying to my daughter on sun, that seeing my mum laying there that she looked like a corpse.

    It still upsets me to think that if I hadn't been there with the GP yest & suggest that a urine sample be sent off & that I had to tell her that I found soaking wet pj bottoms 2 days running, that my mum would by now be even more unwell. That the nurse who spoke to me this morning said she was being treated for a kidney infection, when yest there was no talk of it being a kidney infection, as they were going to assess her for incontinence. I'm just so glad I was there with the GP & that she listened to me.
     
  15. Louby65

    Louby65 Registered User

    Mar 26, 2014
    619
    Scotland
    Well done mother goose ! You shouldn't have had to be the one giving the full recent history to the gp as the nursing home staff should have been able to do that, but as you say, this information would not have been disseminated . If there is blood in the urine it's not always indicative of an infection as they look for other indications which determine bacteria etc and then the correct antibiotic is prescribed . I take it the gp has gave your mum a broad spectrum antibiotic just now but if any specific organism is isolated then the microbiologist will suggest a different one if required . Give it a couple of days and ask what the result was . With your mum being drowsy then she wouldn't have been getting a proper fluid intake and was most likely dehydrated which wouldn't have helped . I know you are happy with this home but I would still ask to speak to the manager and express your concerns . I work in an acute hospital and unfortunately have witnessed some care home patients being admitted with symptoms that had been evident days/ weeks before but staff had neglected to act upon . You are your mums advocate, so exercise your right to ensure she gets the correct care at the correct time . I hope your mum feels better soon and you get some much needed rest . Best wishes


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  16. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    Thank you, Louby 65 for your very helpful reply.
    The GP did give my mum antibiotics, that was after I asked if it could be a uti. I was told the results would be back by Friday.

    My mum was very drowsy for 3 days & drinking very little fluid. I did speak with the receptionist yesterday, who I feel I have a good relationship with & feel I can talk to her & she's always chatty & helpful. I explained to her what happened as she doesn't work at the weekend & that was when my mum was at her worst. She even said to me, did they call a Dr out & seemed surprised when I said no. Would my mum have got better even if she wasn't given antibiotics or did the doses that she's been given start to work quickly?
     
  17. Mother goose

    Mother goose Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    247
    Co.Sligo, Ireland
    I went into visit my mum today & she was back in bed. The nurse told me she'd got up for breakfast then wanted to go back to bed. She didn't want to eat anything at dinner time & refused a cup of tea. She looks better than she did a few days ago, but I'm worried there is something still not right. I was told that the urine results were back yest & that my mum didn't have a urine infectiion, which I was very surprised about.

    Today my mum was complaining of a sore tummy lower down & her tummy looked very big. The nurse examined her, while I was there & said it could be constipation. I asked my mum if she went to the toilet today & thought she did. Having alzheimers she just doesn't remember, when she went last. The head nurse said she'd try a laxative, which they did do & asked me to make sure my mum hung on for as long as she could before going to the toilet & don't let her flush it.

    Thankfully, she was able to go, but her tummy was still the same size. I asked my mum does it feel like constipation, she said no, feels like something inside. I did laugh, as she said, maybe it's twins. I told the nurse that my mum said didnt feel like constipation & she said, we'll start with the laxative & go from there. She was still tired & was drowsy again, before I left.
    If it isnt constipation, does anyone know what else it could be?
     

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