My uncle is struggling to cope so I am looking for some advice?


Registered User
Jan 11, 2008
My Auntie was diagnosed with AD last year although her symptoms have been around for years as they were confused with complications of drugs that arose from failed operations about 10 years ago intended to cure her Trigeminal neuralgia. Her condition is now deteriorating and my uncle struggles physcologically and increasingly has to do things for her. Their two sons who have left home are not understanding and do not give their dad any support only feel that their mum has gone and that he should leave her! He is therefore coping day to day all alone but cares very much for my auntie. He lives in a remote part of the country with no real close friends to turn to and family all live at least 150 miles away. He does have access to the internet but I feel is too afraid to use sites such as this. He says he no longer has confidence with the doctors! His local GP recommends my auntie starts taking Donepezil but he had asked my mum, an ex nurse, to do some research about it first. So, my question is: Can anyone advise on this type of drug or any that work for AD patients? He realises there is no cure but I feel he is desperate to try different things, as to whether thats good or bad I don't know. Also, we as close family member wounder whether there is any advice that could be given to my uncle about his well being?

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Dear Hollymagic

Please do all you can to give your uncle enough confidence to come to TP.

He doesn`t even have to register, he can visit as a guest and read everyone`s posts. This might help him to realize he would be among friends if he did join us.

Really the only people who can advise about drugs are the doctors attending to individuals. The available drugs have such varying effects, no-one can know how beneficial or harmful they can be until they have been tried.


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
Hi Hollymagic, welcome to TP.

As regards drugs, there is am AS factsheet which describes them here:

They can only now be prescribed for people with moderate dementia, and if your aunt fall into this category the consultant may prescribe one of them. They're all very similar in effect, and what works for one person may not work for another. Some people cannot tolerate any of them, but for others they make a huge difference.

I gather your aunt and uncle do not live near you. Have they contacted their local branch of Alzheimer's Society? They will provide lots of support, and possibly meetings they could attend for company.

And do encourage your uncle to join TP, it provides the best source of advice and support around.

Let us know how you get on,