my partner and I

passing clouds

Registered User
Jan 10, 2019
11
0
my wife has has short term memory problems for a couple of years, and seems to be increasing albeit slowly
after a recent CT scan a transitional meningioma was detected but thought to be old and calcified and not immediately of any concern as affecting her brain, but being monitored
she had a CT scan which showed more clearly other factors pointing to alzheimers dementia and is now being treated with donepezil on a trial basis.
vascular treatment is also being used to avoid stroke and heart problems.
if the donepezil can be increased and slows her memory loss after the trial, our consultant has also pointed out that another drug, memantine may well be needed
i am her husband and carer...
this is all new to her and definately to me as i dont know what to expect at any time, regarding her health and mental condition
from time to time i know i will need to ask for some advice and reassurance from the forum
thanks in advance
G
 

karaokePete

Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
6,534
0
N Ireland
Hello @passing clouds, you are welcome here and I hope you find the forum to be a friendly and supportive place.

My wife was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and a significant degree of vascular damage. She is on both Donepezil and Memantine and is doing well on them. My understanding is that these meds don't slow the disease as such, but they enable the maximum use of what capacity is left. Due to this my wife seemed to be brighter when the meds kicked in but she then continued to decline, albeit very slowly.

Do take a good look around the site as it is a goldmine for information. When I first joined I read old threads for information but then found the AS Publications list and the page where a post code search can be done to check for support services in ones own area. If you are interested in these, clicking the following links will take you there

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you

You will see that there are Factsheets that will help with things like getting care needs assessments, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc.

Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
81,444
0
Kent
It`s good to see you on the Forum @passing clouds and I hope you will find it helpful and supportive.

as i dont know what to expect at any time, regarding her health and mental condition

Not many of us do or did. There are similarities but a lot depends on the individual.

Now you have introduced yourself it might be a good idea for you to start your own longer term Thread on either the sub forum I have a partner with dementia so any support you receive will be all in one place.

https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-have-a-partner-with-dementia.69/
 

passing clouds

Registered User
Jan 10, 2019
11
0
thanks...
i am in the right place..
the item i have been having denial with is the "non cure" aspect is hard to imagine
 

kindred

Registered User
Apr 8, 2018
2,937
0
my wife (72) has has short term memory problems for a couple of years, and seems to be increasing albeit slowly
after a recent CT scan a transitional meningioma was detected but thought to be old and calcified and not immediately of any concern as affecting her brain, but being monitored
she had a CT scan which showed more clearly other factors pointing to alzheimers dementia and is now being treated with donepezil on a trial basis.
vascular treatment is also being used to avoid stroke and heart problems.
if the donepezil can be increased and slows her memory loss after the trial, our consultant has also pointed out that another drug, memantine may well be needed
i am her husband and carer..(76).
this is all new to her and definately to me as i dont know what to expect at any time, regarding her health and mental condition...i may be in denial but i find it hard to watch and wait...guess its same for all of us
from time to time i know i will need to ask for some advice and reassurance from the forum
thanks in advance
G
welcome! This is a great forum and you will find so many encouraging and knowledgeable friends here. It is hard to watch and wait, but it does sound as though your wife's condition is gradual and that is good. Warmest, Kindred
 

karaokePete

Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
6,534
0
N Ireland
thanks...
i am in the right place..
the item i have been having denial with is the "non cure" aspect is hard to imagine
With a bit of luck things will progress at a slow pace and enable both of you to make the best of things.

My wife and I still enjoy life most of the time. Dementia causes us problems and always remains the elephant in the room but we carry on with our life much as it was before the diagnosis - it's just a bit more tiring and frustrating.

I am always positive and I hope you can be the same. I have found that acceptance of our new reality helps me to make the most of our present. I don't think about ' past what if's' and don't worry about what is to come. I stay rooted in the present and make the best of it while dealing with problems as they arise.

The information and support on this site will help both of you.
 

passing clouds

Registered User
Jan 10, 2019
11
0
my wife (72) has has short term memory problems for a couple of years, and seems to be increasing albeit slowly
after a recent CT scan a transitional meningioma was detected but thought to be old and calcified and not immediately of any concern as affecting her brain, but being monitored
she had a CT scan which showed more clearly other factors pointing to alzheimers dementia and is now being treated with donepezil on a trial basis.
vascular treatment is also being used to avoid stroke and heart problems.
if the donepezil can be increased and slows her memory loss after the trial, our consultant has also pointed out that another drug, memantine may well be needed
i am her husband and carer..(76).
this is all new to her and definately to me as i dont know what to expect at any time, regarding her health and mental condition...i may be in denial but i find it hard to watch and wait...guess its same for all of us
from time to time i know i will need to ask for some advice and reassurance from the forum
thanks in advance
G

We have volunteered to help with studies by others on our situation. They will visit our home in a week or so to help with gathering data.
 

passing clouds

Registered User
Jan 10, 2019
11
0
yes i couldnt find it easily...could i keep this one and delete the other..
got a bit confused when i tried both partner/carer threads and didnt see my thread..early days, where i hoped it would be and easy to fin
what do you advise
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
25,018
0
South coast
If you go to the top of this thread you will see under the blue "reply to thread" box the words Watch Thread in blue. If you click on these words you will get a notification sent to you every time someone posts on it. You can also find the thread by hovering over your icon (top right on the blue strip) and clicking on Bookmarks - then going to Watched Threads

If you havent clicked on watch thread, then you can also find your threads by going to your profile page, click on Postings , scroll down to the bottom and click on All threads started by xxx
 

passing clouds

Registered User
Jan 10, 2019
11
0
If you go to the top of this thread you will see under the blue "reply to thread" box the words Watch Thread in blue. If you click on these words you will get a notification sent to you every time someone posts on it. You can also find the thread by hovering over your icon (top right on the blue strip) and clicking on Bookmarks - then going to Watched Threads

If you havent clicked on watch thread, then you can also find your threads by going to your profile page, click on Postings , scroll down to the bottom and click on All threads started by xxx

thanks...i have got that now...and have ticked the watch thread
i want to be able to get any support i can get here....and i suppose give it when time goes on and i learn to cope
and of course to thank those that reply
cheers
 

passing clouds

Registered User
Jan 10, 2019
11
0
welcome! This is a great forum and you will find so many encouraging and knowledgeable friends here. It is hard to watch and wait, but it does sound as though your wife's condition is gradual and that is good. Warmest, Kindred
thanks to you for your encouragement..
i know as days, etc go on i will get a feeling for the rate of change...and as you say i do believe it will be slow
i think i am compressing the suggested signs which take over a period of time into shorter anxiety scenarios
bless you
 

kindred

Registered User
Apr 8, 2018
2,937
0
thanks to you for your encouragement..
i know as days, etc go on i will get a feeling for the rate of change...and as you say i do believe it will be slow
i think i am compressing the suggested signs which take over a period of time into shorter anxiety scenarios
bless you
Oh sweetheart, I totally understand. The earlier stages like this can have so many beautiful moments in them. Please keep anxiety at bay. With warmest wishes, Geraldine aka kindred.
 

Pollyjones

Registered User
Jul 30, 2017
7
0
Shropshire
I am in a similar situation my husband was diagnosed 4 years ago with Alzeimers but refused drugs or help. No problems other than poor memory. At his second assessment he had not noticeably deteriorated and refused the assessment test so he was dismissed under MIL. In the past 18 months he has changed in many ways and I have managed at last to get him to see the Memory Clinic again, I need their help as he progresses on the downhill slide. I, and our sons would like him to try drugs to slow down the deterioration, he is not 68 yet but due to various previous health issues is fighting taking more medication. His assessment is next Tuesday at home so he feels more relaxed. Fingers crossed we get the result of help we need.

I will let you know how it goes. This is not the beginning of our journey by any means but hopefully we will know exactly what & where we stand in the process. Thankfully he forgets he has the disease but we are not so lucky.
 

passing clouds

Registered User
Jan 10, 2019
11
0
I am in a similar situation my husband was diagnosed 4 years ago with Alzeimers but refused drugs or help. No problems other than poor memory. At his second assessment he had not noticeably deteriorated and refused the assessment test so he was dismissed under MIL. In the past 18 months he has changed in many ways and I have managed at last to get him to see the Memory Clinic again, I need their help as he progresses on the downhill slide. I, and our sons would like him to try drugs to slow down the deterioration, he is not 68 yet but due to various previous health issues is fighting taking more medication. His assessment is next Tuesday at home so he feels more relaxed. Fingers crossed we get the result of help we need.

I will let you know how it goes. This is not the beginning of our journey by any means but hopefully we will know exactly what & where we stand in the process. Thankfully he forgets he has the disease but we are not so lucky.

you must impress if you can the benefits physically and psychologically of taking any type of medication
my personal experience may be helpful
in 2011 i was diagnosed with prostate cancer and the consultant said biopsies would be necessary and wanted to set a date. i insisted the biopsies be done immediately and they were done that day, and looked forward to the results so i could get on with whatever needed to be done....my treatment was 19 radiations and 6 years of hormone implants, which may have to be resumed soon.
my wife is the same pushing for CT and MRI scans and to move forward with drug treatment and all which medicine can offer, it's ones right and shouldn't be thrown away untimely.
the results in some way will benefit the affected and help those in the future by monitoring results on a national basis. we have embarked on a study now for cardiff university via our local council.
this isnt brag or boasting...its all one can do for themselves, their families and the greater good, not to acknowledge that holding on to life is what is at stake.
the problem with alzhiemers as far as i know is unable to be cured and cant be sidelined to try to cure other conditions your husband also is being treated for.
hope this helps and your husband begins to realise how important his attitude towards taking further drugs changes.
 

passing clouds

Registered User
Jan 10, 2019
11
0
I am in a similar situation my husband was diagnosed 4 years ago with Alzeimers but refused drugs or help. No problems other than poor memory. At his second assessment he had not noticeably deteriorated and refused the assessment test so he was dismissed under MIL. In the past 18 months he has changed in many ways and I have managed at last to get him to see the Memory Clinic again, I need their help as he progresses on the downhill slide. I, and our sons would like him to try drugs to slow down the deterioration, he is not 68 yet but due to various previous health issues is fighting taking more medication. His assessment is next Tuesday at home so he feels more relaxed. Fingers crossed we get the result of help we need.

I will let you know how it goes. This is not the beginning of our journey by any means but hopefully we will know exactly what & where we stand in the process. Thankfully he forgets he has the disease but we are not so lucky.

good luck
we have one on thursday...
 

Pollyjones

Registered User
Jul 30, 2017
7
0
Shropshire
Well OH actually sat with the member of the memory clinic on Tuesday last and even though he was dead against taking 'the test' once she was in the house and chatting she won him over, so I discreetly moved to the kitchen. I find it difficult 'snitching' on him in front of his face. He really doesn't realise how he is failing. I know compared to what is likely to be ahead of us they are only minor changes but each one scares me. Anyway, he proved short term memory very poor and found finding words for images almost impossible. He scored just 52% which to be honest was less than I had expected.

We are on holiday next week into the sunshine, here's hoping some us time will relax him so doesn't feel any pressure. I know he will be following me every where, which does get to me sometimes, but we will get by OK.
On our return he will see Michelle from MC so she can discuss his diagnosis and treatment etc. All of this he seems calm about, thankfully.

To be honest, I am struggling keeping things together as my mum 84 appears to be suffering a breast cancer which won't be treated due to her other health issues, she is my dads carer, so that is difficult. Then my son has moved in with us after his wife asked him to leave, ( she is suffering a Mental breakdown and really isn't coping with our two grandchildren) they stay over 2-3 times a week. They are really not naughty girls but at 6 & 2 they are the straw that I find too heavy. So many different issues I just want my OH to try medication to relax him more perhaps I should be looking to the GP too. Luckily I still get to go to work three days a week.

Like others on here, I feel better having put my woes in writing, tomorrow, I will pop over to mum's and then do my ironing before the girls arrive. As long OH is with me he will be fine.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
81,444
0
Kent
Hello @Pollyjones.

I agree with marionq you have more than your share to manage and I take my hat off to you.

I think it would help if you started a Thread of your own. This way all your supportive replies and discussions will be more easily accessible.

Please use either sub forum I have a partner with dementia or I care for a person with dementia. You will find them here.

https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-have-a-partner-with-dementia.69/

https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-care-for-a-person-with-dementia.70/
 

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