Hi Elizabeth
You are not alone. My mother has been the dominant force in my life all my life, and it is frightening to experience the reversal of roles, as in effect you become the parent and they become the child.
I can't offer you a quick fix - if there is one, I don't know of it. For me, it has just been a gradual coming to terms with the way things are. During that process, it has hurt like hell; mentally and emotionally, you are fighting it all the time - inwardly you say to yourself that this is not how things are meant to be and you want them to change back to the way they were so much.
Eventually I realised that I can't fight Alzhemer's; I can't change the fact that Mum has it. What I can do, though, is make sure that she is safe and happy and well-cared-for, which she seems to be in the home where she has been for the last 4 1/2 weeks. She has her ups and downs - tonight when I went to see her, there was a touch of paranoia about the things she was saying, but the next time I go, she will be different again.
It's still difficult, but I have noticed that I don't start crying quite as often now. I'm taking that as a sign that I'm adjusting to the situation. It does take time, and even now, I still have a way to go, I think.
Love
Christine
xxx