Please dont beat yourself up. Your mum was already going downhill before she moved - that was why you moved her! She may have continued to deteriorate rapidly, even if she had been at home. My mum went from being able to wash and dress herself, looking after her home and cooking for herself to not washing, changing her clothes, being unable to cook for herself, becoming incontinent and wandering outside in the wee small hours dressed only in her nightwear, all in the space of 6 months - and she had not moved.
Im afraid that falls, broken bones and surgery often progress dementia. It was a fall breaking her hip and having surgery that progressed mum to End of Life. She never recovered from the hip surgery and passed away a month later.
It is almost impossible to prevent falls - someone can be stood right next to you and just go down.
You cannot win with dementia - the eventual outcome is always the same and you did what seemed to be the best thing at the time.
xx
Thanks, i do beat myself up but its a natural reaction I think, I don't carry around with me all the time just on bad days, sorry to hear about your mum, and thanks for the response, just getting things out has helped today. I remember my my mum just before xmas she had her knickers over her jeans like superman and had 7 socks on one foot and 2 bras on, it was funny at the time , but not also. take care xPlease dont beat yourself up. Your mum was already going downhill before she moved - that was why you moved her! She may have continued to deteriorate rapidly, even if she had been at home. My mum went from being able to wash and dress herself, looking after her home and cooking for herself to not washing, changing her clothes, being unable to cook for herself, becoming incontinent and wandering outside in the wee small hours dressed only in her nightwear, all in the space of 6 months - and she had not moved.
Im afraid that falls, broken bones and surgery often progress dementia. It was a fall breaking her hip and having surgery that progressed mum to End of Life. She never recovered from the hip surgery and passed away a month later.
It is almost impossible to prevent falls - someone can be stood right next to you and just go down.
You cannot win with dementia - the eventual outcome is always the same and you did what seemed to be the best thing at the time.
xx
thank youWelcome to DTP. I'm so sorry to hear of your plight. Hind sight is such a waste of emotions, we do what we think is best at the time. No one can ask more of you. Please don't beat yourself up about it and you certainly haven't let your mum down.
Please feel free to keep posting here no one judges you, but everyone will support you.
...it was funny at the time , but not also. take care x