We have believed my mum 60 has had dementia for nearly a year.
She won't talk about it or see anyone.
My dad 61 has done all meals and everything for her for many months now.
Her personality is gone and there is no real conversation there anymore other than. How are you.
Just before Christmas my dad told me he was finding it hard and we should speak, then lock down.
Finally I got a call from my dad last night.
He was outside my house with scratches on his face bleeding.
We walked and he told me everything.
The slapping and scratching has been happening since November.
He showed me pictures he had. There was a lot.
He said for the last year or so he has done everything in the house, cooked cleaned etc.
He says there is good and bad sides.
And when she is good it's fine but when she turns he gets pelted with abuse calling him lazy and that he does nothing.
The the hitting starts.
He took it for a while but he has had to start running out of the house and spent hours walking the streets or getting the trains and buses to the end of the line and back.
He also has a sleeping bag that he has put himself in, in the car.
I was horrified, we knew that there so something wrong, but she has never shown any violence to us.
From our side, we saw a decline in her memory and her want to do things without my dad there.
We brought up seeing a doctor before but she just gets defencive, crys and says no.
Dad has said that she has cared for him for 35 years, now it was time to care for her.
But he has now come to his limit.
My dad was a Royal Marine, he was a policeman. He is a proud man but he cried when he spoke to me last night.
He doesn't know what to do, I have said we have to get help for mum and that I will get on it.
Sorry if I repeated myself here I have done it in 2 sittings.
My point.
Please help me know what I can do for mum and dad.
She won't talk about it or see anyone.
My dad 61 has done all meals and everything for her for many months now.
Her personality is gone and there is no real conversation there anymore other than. How are you.
Just before Christmas my dad told me he was finding it hard and we should speak, then lock down.
Finally I got a call from my dad last night.
He was outside my house with scratches on his face bleeding.
We walked and he told me everything.
The slapping and scratching has been happening since November.
He showed me pictures he had. There was a lot.
He said for the last year or so he has done everything in the house, cooked cleaned etc.
He says there is good and bad sides.
And when she is good it's fine but when she turns he gets pelted with abuse calling him lazy and that he does nothing.
The the hitting starts.
He took it for a while but he has had to start running out of the house and spent hours walking the streets or getting the trains and buses to the end of the line and back.
He also has a sleeping bag that he has put himself in, in the car.
I was horrified, we knew that there so something wrong, but she has never shown any violence to us.
From our side, we saw a decline in her memory and her want to do things without my dad there.
We brought up seeing a doctor before but she just gets defencive, crys and says no.
Dad has said that she has cared for him for 35 years, now it was time to care for her.
But he has now come to his limit.
My dad was a Royal Marine, he was a policeman. He is a proud man but he cried when he spoke to me last night.
He doesn't know what to do, I have said we have to get help for mum and that I will get on it.
Sorry if I repeated myself here I have done it in 2 sittings.
My point.
Please help me know what I can do for mum and dad.