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My mum deteriorating

15moterbike

Registered User
Jan 17, 2022
93
0
I’m sorry for what your mum is going through and the effects it has on you and family.

I assume the NH have given you ECG status but under recent guidance issues by government, under special circumstances you can have more than one essential carer. Speak to the Manager of the home and ask if your brother can visit under the circumstances.

I’ve also seen it written many times here, EOL is not the last days of life but can be the final year. Sadly for your mum it does sound like she is in the final stage so ask the home to show some compassion. COVID has made them all risk averse yet we all know, many people in care homes will die of things other than this dreadful pandemic.

Look after yourself for the weeks ahead,
i just called the home the nurse said she did eat better yesterday so who knows she may linger on in this hell for a while longer , mum Has been bedbound 2 years now screaming and shaking but recently still shaking mumbling words that make no sense and horrific facial tics . She can’t move a inch , they have a covid case there who has gone to hospital but I hope to visit a week Sunday .
 

15moterbike

Registered User
Jan 17, 2022
93
0
This is such a terrible time for you, my thoughts are with you both. I have queried before with mums nursing home and GP about end of life , the home states this is the last 48 hours, for visiting. It all seems particularly unfair and cruel to those like your mum with Parkinson's and dementia. I don t understand why these conditions are not given the same support and treatment care that those receive in hospices.
Have you been able to discuss her care with the go who she's with ? It might help with forming end of life care plan with the nursing home. Best wishes.
We have liased with gp she has eol meds for When she does deteriate has needed the hyoscine sc for secretions but not for a week and the nurse today said she ate better yesterday, I know just because you eat you don’t always absorb it at this stage she has very little muscle on her arms are like twigs legs not much better . this one nurse always looks at the brighter side phraps of the picture . , they have a covid resident now in hospital so we will see what happens next ,mum had it last year I have it now 2nd time
 

15moterbike

Registered User
Jan 17, 2022
93
0
I’m sorry for what your mum is going through and the effects it has on you and family.

I assume the NH have given you ECG status but under recent guidance issues by government, under special circumstances you can have more than one essential carer. Speak to the Manager of the home and ask if your brother can visit under the circumstances.

I’ve also seen it written many times here, EOL is not the last days of life but can be the final year. Sadly for your mum it does sound like she is in the final stage so ask the home to show some compassion. COVID has made them all risk averse yet we all know, many people in care homes will die of things other than this dreadful pandemic.

Look after yourself for the weeks ahead,
Thankyou do you think she is heading towards the end of this horrid journey , it’s hell 2 years of bed rest sceaming shaking now skin and bones ,I can’t even say it would be sad just a relief . Even before this was years of horrific hallucinations falls broken bones madness no qol for years , heartbreaking and cruel, other terminal illnesses are not treated like this there is much more help compassion and understanding
 

Chaplin

Registered User
May 24, 2015
179
0
Bristol
Thankyou do you think she is heading towards the end of this horrid journey , it’s hell 2 years of bed rest sceaming shaking now skin and bones ,I can’t even say it would be sad just a relief . Even before this was years of horrific hallucinations falls broken bones madness no qol for years , heartbreaking and cruel, other terminal illnesses are not treated like this there is much more help compassion and understanding
Sadly that is only something those with medical knowledge can predict. It amazes me where they draw on their own reserves to keep going. From what others have experienced and the fact the GP has already prescribed EOL meds, it sounds like she is in the final stages of this awful disease.
It is hard watching our loved ones slowly lose more and more of their functions and I agree, it would appear interventions are managed differently with other terminal illnesses but I’m sure the NH are managing any pain or discomfort. Be kind to yourself.
 

15moterbike

Registered User
Jan 17, 2022
93
0
Sadly that is only something those with medical knowledge can predict. It amazes me where they draw on their own reserves to keep going. From what others have experienced and the fact the GP has already prescribed EOL meds, it sounds like she is in the final stages of this awful disease.
It is hard watching our loved ones slowly lose more and more of their functions and I agree, it would appear interventions are managed differently with other terminal illnesses but I’m sure the NH are managing any pain or discomfort. Be kind to yourself.
Thankyou for being kind , im Sure mum has been blind for some time ,hard to tell with hearing incontient for years bedridden for years the only function she has left was she could somehow swallow but that is so much worse now and often refusing any intake . Eol meds are for in place for when needed but recently needing glyco for secretions, weighloss just increasing , living hell, I am visiting next Sunday so will see what I find and hope others will be alloweed to visit soon as they are still on restrictions due to covid amongst staff at Xmas and apparently one resident has just got it which is sad . Thanks for listening
 

15moterbike

Registered User
Jan 17, 2022
93
0
I’m visiting Sunday care home has 2 cases of covid so I’m only one alloweed to visit , I have been told today that mum is a lot frailer yet again than when I visited 3 weeks ago very small Intake and very thin , they are not weighing her but it’s obvious from looking at her . I know this may not be the end yet but feel the continuation of a recent rapid decline
 

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