My Mother in Law has Alzheimers, lives in the UK, we live in the States

[Irisforgets]

My husband and I need advice on how to get power of attorney, even though his Mother does not think that she needs to give the approval.
She seems to be going downhill fast but my husband would not use that power unless it was absolutely necessary.

Could you please offer him guidance on what to do.
Thank you

 

[jaymor]

If your Mother in law won’t give her permission then unfortunately there is nothing your husband can do. If she looses capacity then he can apply to become her deputy but I’m unsure how that would be obtained with you living in America. Hopefully someone will be along with some advice when two countries are involved.


I've just found this, hopefully it might help

The Overseas Court of Protection Deputy

Traditionally the answer was no, as the Court felt uncomfortable supervising someone outside the jurisdiction. There has since been a long debate on when this is appropriate and in short, it now really depends on the individual case

www.anthonygold.co.uk

 

[JanBWiltshire]

My husband and I need advice on how to get power of attorney, even though his Mother does not think that she needs to give the approval.
She seems to be going downhill fast but my husband would not use that power unless it was absolutely necessary.

Could you please offer him guidance on what to do.
Thank you,
Wendy Taylor

It is very wise to get POA before the person loses capacity. It is a difficult subject and made tougher if she doesn’t want to let you do that. Can you have a chat and say that it is not taking over now, but would make things easier when things become difficult for her.

we had to do it for my parents as I had to deal with the bank and that is impossible without POA.

Do you have family in UK who could go and chat over the positives with her? If she has dementia, reasoning might be difficult.

 

[nitram]

If your Mother in law still has capacity you could try explaining that Lasting Powers of Attorney are useful to have if she has an accident and cannot, even temporarily, handle her own affairs. It gives her the ability to choose who will act on her behalf.
Several of DTP members, myself included, have made LPAs as an insurance against what might happen in the future.

 

[Shedrech]

Hello @Irisforgets
A warm welcome to DTP

Might you tell her that Martin Lewis the 'money expert' suggests every adult have LPAs in place for just in case... he does, on his website
and that the Attorneys cannot act without her permission, so could only help if she were ill
you could complete the paperwork for LPAs for you also asking her to be named as Attorney... then set it aside... but register hers immediately so they are good to go and you can put the documents somewhere safe

 

[Canadian Joanne]

Would the argument that it would prevent "the government" taking over help? I had the forms out and every time I saw my mother (who was in a retirement home at the time), I would say, 'We'll have to do something with these soon'. After a few weeks, she signed it.