My Mom


Registered User
Aug 11, 2007
My Mom has had the illness 12 years but it has got worse over
the last 12 months. Last week she lashed out at my Dad and
she was trying to get out of the house. Anyway, he called the
doctor, who came out, then he called the social worker, who
got her admitted to hospital (psyciatric) she has been put onto
section 3 of the mental health act. My dad is gutted - he thought
they could give her medication and send her home. Now they are
talking of a care home because it is taking 5 staff to get her
into bed at night and get her washed in the morning - as she
keeps fighting them.

They are waiting for some test results to come back and then
we have to have a meeting with the social worker and the doctor.

If dad says he doesn't want her to go into a home will they pull
the plug on the nurses she has had at home (1 nurse) coming
in morning and night, who has had to leave because mom would
not co-operate.

If she goes into a home what wil happen to dad as he lives in the
home the have brought and what about any savings he has.

We are jusat totally confused at the moment.

Any help appreciated.


Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Hello Liz, welcome to Talking Point.

Your mother has been ill for a long time, and you`ve done well to keep her at home so far.

I`m sorry her condition has deteriorated.

As far as your parent`s home goes, no one has any claim to the house. it is your dad`s home and no-one can put him out.

As for savings, I can`t say, but I`m sure someone else will know the precise details.

Take care xx


Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
If she goes into a home what wil happen to dad as he lives in the
home the have brought and what about any savings he has.
sorry can't help on that issue .

(1 nurse) coming
in morning and night, who has had to leave because mom would
not co-operate.
Just that my mother done that with the district nurses last year , told them to F of .

I remember her shouting at them , but not telling them that , I new thats why they never been around for a long while , told doctor that he would not believe me till they rang them

I had forgotten about about that until I went to the doctor about mum and she has not had a blood test for 2 years , when receptionist phone and ask why they had not come around , they reminded her that my mother had told them to F of .

I had to sit mum down tell her a few home truth, that if she does not let district nurse test her blood or blood pursuer , I can't keep looking after her and she go into a home .

she said she does not like them , because they make her worse :rolleyes: she said they can come in , as long as I don't have long conversation with me , she very paranoid when it come to professional people


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
Hi Liz, welcome to TP.

You must be very worried about your mom, but you and your dad have done very well to care for your mum at home for so long. It does sound though that it has become too much for you to cope with now.

It sounds as if it is time for your dad to allow her to be cared for in a home. It will be so much easier for you both, and you will be able to enjoy visiting without having the stress of day to day management.

Your dad's home is not at risk at all, as long as he lives in it it will not be considered in the assessment.

Tha social worker will assess how much your dad would have to contribute toward care, depending on how much he has in savings. It could be that he will not have to contribute at all.

Please try not to worry, I'm sure the doctor and SW will work out the best solution for all three of you.

Let us know how you get on.


Registered User
Apr 15, 2007
Hi Lizzy, welcome to TP.

Sorry to read of your situation. You and your dad have done remarkably well to look after mum at home for such a long time. I'm sorry I can't help with your questions, as I'm not from the UK. I do hope that everything gets sorted to your dads likening. Best Wishes. Taffy.


Registered User
Aug 20, 2006
I don't think you need worry about the home. If for example Dad owned the house and only he lived there and he had to go into a home, then the local authority would consider it a disposable asset and it would have to be sold to fund his care.

However, a special rule says that if the home is occupied by the spouse then it must be automatically be disregarded as an asset. Husbands and wives are particularly protected in this respect.

As your dad lives in the home then it will be disregarded.

In any case, I believe that anyone who goes into care on leaving hospital under certain provisions of the Mental Health Act (a section), they must have their care funded by the NHS because it cannot be considered as anything other than a case of a medical need.

If you are concerned then you could consult with a Citizens Advice about the financial aspects, but I am fairly sure that the home is protected in this case.

The local authority has a duty not to render people homeless (mostly because they are then responsible for housing them again!)
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Registered User
May 6, 2007
norwich norfolk
hi my mum was also admitted to hospital under section. when a person is under section 3 and leaves hospital to go to a care home, all fees are paid for in full under section 117 aftercare. do you have a SW?, they will be able to help arrange this. in my mum's case we looked at several different homes who then assessed her and we chose the one we were happy with. then her case went to the funding panel and they agreed to pay all fees. I hope this is of help to you. i wish I had known aftercare was paid for, as it would have saved alot of worry. love candi


Registered User
Aug 11, 2007
Hi Candi, yes she does have a SW. I have not heard about this panel
though. Who sends you there? and how do they agree if they will
pay funding?