my mams gone

Big Effort

Account Closed
Jul 8, 2012
You could not have expressed anything any better. Glad you had the outcome the way you did, and you did your Mum proud despite the horrible illness. Well done you for coping magnificently right until the end. There you were, making the right decisions on her behalf at a time when she couldn't articulate what was right for her.
Of course it is sad to lose a parent to death, but it is also sad to tend a parent with dementia. Now, this aspect of loss is over for both of you.
May things go smoothly for you and yours over the next days. Hugs and sincere condolences, BE


Registered User
Aug 8, 2012
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. It sounds like your mum slipped away so peacefully. As a lady I used to know once said when we lost my grandmother "She knows all the secrets now".

Sending you hugs and love xxx


Registered User
Dec 3, 2012

Your words are truly beautiful. I hope I have the same courage when the time comes. I have only just recently found TP but find it invaluable.

My thoughts are with you and your family.



Registered User
Apr 8, 2012
Please accept my sincere condolences. TP is invaluable at every stage of this dreadful disease and personally I dont know how I would have coped without it. Even if you have a simple worry, everyone here is so understanding and helpful.


Registered User
Mar 26, 2011
Near Southampton
Please accept my sincere condolences on your very sad loss. I am relieved that her passing was peaceful. That must be some comfort for you in your grief. X


Registered User
Sep 24, 2012
so sorry to hear about your loss. Like you I dont post a lot but always read posts and each time I end up in tears, but it does prepare me for what I know is too come. :(


Registered User
May 20, 2009
Dear Oldsoulchild,
I'm so sorry for your loss, but hope it is of some comfort,
that your Mum is no longer suffering.

Please accept my condolences.

Geum xxx


Registered User
Apr 16, 2008
thankyou for all your comments
i cant believe she's gone...
i am going back to work on monday, no doubt 6pm monday night is when it sinks in when i realise i have to go to my house and not to visit mam in her care home, the new routine! :(


Registered User
Jan 19, 2013
I'm so sorry for your loss. I only started on here this morning and have spent hours reading through all the threads and it's an invaluable site. I hope so much that you can comfort from the thoughts and prayers that are coming your way, best wishes


Registered User
Apr 16, 2008
well i didnt manage to get to work, got all stressed about it and couldnt face it.
same again this morning so they suggested i go in at 1pm for a brew, i agreed but a friend turned up so i didnt go, we're trying again for tomorrow... fingers crossed, i know i need to do it, but im finding it so hard. im hoping to see a doctor tomorrow in case i need a sick note.
its sooo hard

Big Effort

Account Closed
Jul 8, 2012
Hi Oldsoulchild,
Of course it is so hard. Lots and lots of what we do here is SO HARD, isn't it? I really wouldn't worry. Just let things take their good old time. You have been on a rollercoaster, are still being whirled around, and just be gentle, gentle, gentle to you.

Keep on posting, you know we are here. You are not alone in feeling this way. Nor is there any harm in feeling like that. I hope you feel surrounded by good friends and their kindness.....

Thinking of you and sending you gentle vibes to nudge you into a more comfortable zone.
With love, and well done you, you are doing just great just as you are, BE


Registered User
Sep 21, 2008
East Coast of Australia
one day at a time

So sorry you lost your dear mam oldsoulchild, I lost my husband on 19th September and my Mum om 20th November so still mourning for both of them.

Just take one day at a time. Put your feet on the floor, stand up and say: "Today I have to...." and do the best you can.

I don't know how I would have gone if I had to go back to work after three weeks but you know your strengths and you will know how to deal with this.

I still hang around here as it still helps me to cope with life.



Registered User
Oct 11, 2012
Oldsoulchild you sound such a lovely daughter, doing everything that you could and being sensitive to your Mum's needs right to the end. Look after yourself in the time to come, be kind to yourself X