Dear Maryanne,
My mother had to go into an EMI Nursing Home when she broke her hip and she was terribly distressed and ill at first. Fortunately, the mental health nurses realised that she still had lucid moments and was able to hold a normal conversation and she was moved into the general nursing section of the home after two weeks.
Once the medication was sorted out, so that she was less depressed and became more settled, things were better. Then she got to know the staff-not necessarily by name, but she did recognise individuals and began to chat to them. After a couple of months she made a friend in the nursing home, who came to "visit" her in her room and they would sit for hours together.
I visited several times a week and sometimes Mum knew who I was and sometimes she didn't, but usually she was settled and contented. I have nothing but praise for all the staff, including the ancillary staff who all treated Mum with respect and kindness.
Mum had a tummy bug in May, which she was recovering from, but then unexpectedly had a heart attack at six o'clock in the morning and died quickly on arrival at the hospital, just before we arrived. She wasn't alone, because the NH staff and hospital staff had been caring for her all the time and she looked really peaceful.
I also thought how well looked after and well cared for she seemed to be. Mum had enjoyed the food at the NH and also had her hair done every couple of weeks, by a lovely, friendly and chatty hairdresser at the home.
There are lots of negative reports of homes in the press, but there are plenty of good homes with caring staff, but these just don't seem to get the same publicity.
I'm sure things will improve for you all and there does come a time, when 24/7 care is essential for the well-being of someone suffering from dementia.
Kayla