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My FIL has Stomach Cancer

Gigi bushes

New member
Dec 11, 2021
6
0
HI there, my FIL has stomach cancer, diagnosed after a stroke in September. His oncologist said surgery not suitable. He moved to ours to recover and his new oncologist has offered surgery to hopefully get rid of the cancer.
Since this offer we think he has developed dementia particularly lewy body. Memory quite good but often confused and doesn't do well with tasks, dates, days etc. Sleeping all day. Seeing people that aren't there. Can smell the soup I am cooking during the night!? And hears voices.
It's very up and down and if you met him briefly you wouldn't know.

We were delighted at 1st with the surgery offer but now not so sure.
He probably won't be able to live alone again.

This forum is great. We wish everyone else well
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
76,303
0
Kent
Hello @Gigi bushes

All I know is a general anaesthetic could have a detrimental effect on the cognitive function of people with dementia. It will be a very difficult decision.

 

Gigi bushes

New member
Dec 11, 2021
6
0
They are not going to give him chemo as he is not strong enough. They may offer him that if he doesn't go for the op. Tomorrow he has a laparoscopy and endoscopy the next day. He had ct scan last week. Waiting to see if it has spread. He was improving after hospital but we noticed a sharp decline about 4 or 5 weeks ago. Its very hard to show people as he remembers lots but very confused about order and organising. He used to be very good at this, excessively but now he is still trying to do his little systems but no longer works for him. He is now blind on his left side. Sweating at night or very cold. Hearing seems to have gone funny too.
I am going to call doc as soon as they open as I feel the medical experts don't have all the info.
He won't talk about his illness, all the options, what he wants for the future. We are happy to have him stay with us but he doesn't talk about if he can't go home what the plan is, what he wants. Lack of chat from him is probably the hardest part
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
18,843
0
South coast
Was the CT scan that he had just for the stomach, or did he have a full body scan?
What Im trying to get to is Im wondering whether they have ruled out secondaries as a cause for his dementia like symptoms, loss of vision etc.
 

Duggies-girl

Registered User
Sep 6, 2017
3,348
0
They are not going to give him chemo as he is not strong enough. They may offer him that if he doesn't go for the op. Tomorrow he has a laparoscopy and endoscopy the next day. He had ct scan last week. Waiting to see if it has spread. He was improving after hospital but we noticed a sharp decline about 4 or 5 weeks ago. Its very hard to show people as he remembers lots but very confused about order and organising. He used to be very good at this, excessively but now he is still trying to do his little systems but no longer works for him. He is now blind on his left side. Sweating at night or very cold. Hearing seems to have gone funny too.
I am going to call doc as soon as they open as I feel the medical experts don't have all the info.
He won't talk about his illness, all the options, what he wants for the future. We are happy to have him stay with us but he doesn't talk about if he can't go home what the plan is, what he wants. Lack of chat from him is probably the hardest part
@Gigi bushes My dad had oesophageal cancer and his oncologist said straight away that he was not strong enough for the operation and we all agreed. My dad was 87 at diagnosis and very frail due to weight loss. His oncologist also said that chemotherapy would be detrimental to dad and would likely make him very ill or even kill him, again we all agreed. She did say that he could possibly have a course of low dose radiotherapy if needed but it never was. You don't say how old your FIL is or how robust his general health is although his other symptoms would worry me.

The operation is not something to be undertaken lightly. I would worry about the recovery period and how it would affect his dementia. A hospital stay can cause a downturn and coupled with anaesthetic which can do the same would be really worrying.

To be honest unless your FIL is relatively young I am surprised that they are even considering the operation. My dad was put on palliative care and lasted another two years without any other interventions other than a stent (which was really beneficial for him) He remained at home until he died and was very happy. His oncologist said that she was taking a chance on him but it was the right decision and I am ever thankful to her.

Hopefully you will have a better idea of what is going on tomorrow and I agree you need to speak to the doctor and make sure that they have all the info.
 

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