My Father in law and care home

Discussion in 'Welcome and how to use Talking Point' started by sampson1, Nov 30, 2018.

  1. sampson1

    sampson1 New member

    Nov 30, 2018
    1
    My father in law was accepted into a home around 6 weeks ago and has passed the stage of having his care package agreed. At a visit today we received a definite notification that the home cannot cope with him because he wanders. Given that the home is “dementia “ friendly how can they now say he is a problem. I can’t understand how we can live with a society that doesn’t care about the wellbeing of our elderly and ill people unless it’s easy and profitable. We feel at our wits end
     
  2. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    7,577
    Female
    South coast
    Hello @sampson1 and welcome to Talking Point

    There is a big difference between a care home that is dementia friendly and one specialising in dementia.
    Many care homes say that they will accept people with dementia and usually they are residential homes that mosly cater for people who are frail and elderly. They will accept people with dementia, but only early dementia and once symptoms like wandering, being up at night, going into other residents rooms, resistance to personal care and/or any form of aggression start they will move them on. Often this is because of complaints from residents without dementia or (more often) their relatives.

    You will need to look at dedicated dementia units or EMI units. When you visit a home ask them how they would cope with things like wandering and resistance to personal care and what things they would not accept. This will give you an idea of whether he is likely to be asked to move.

    It is very easy to just look at at all the fadcilities, lovely decor and bells and whistles, but, in all honesty, they are not necessary. Try and look beyond the decor (mums care home was rather shabby) and go for somewhere with a homely atmosphere and good caring staff.
     
  3. karaokePete

    karaokePete Volunteer Host

    Jul 23, 2017
    3,451
    Male
    Hello @sampson1, welcome to the forum from me too.

    If you do need to move your FiL maybe this site will help you locate a more appropriate Home. It contains details and reviews for homes and I know it is quite accurate for my area

    https://www.carehome.co.uk/
     
  4. J53

    J53 Registered User

    Oct 9, 2018
    26
    Hi Sampson
    My father went straight from hospital into the a care home that was supposed to be the best in the area but as my father can't do anything he just lies in a bed or puts himself on the floor the care home could not cope with him and they were a specialist in Dementia but there is a light at the end of the tunnel my father is in an amazing one now although he does not wander but people there do wander and the home have sections where they live and are free to roam also they have things on the wall where they can unlock , lock , play with chains allsorts it helps with the wandering you just gave to view and view again hope this helps
     

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