My darling mum has flown

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by LIZ50, Jun 1, 2008.

  1. LIZ50

    LIZ50 Registered User

    Mar 23, 2008
    My darling mum joined the angels this afternoon with me, my partner, her brother and sister-in-law at her side. Although expected, the ending came quite suddenly and she fought it every step of the way.
    Found her unconscious in bed Friday morning and called paramedics
    who rushed her in straight to rescus. A consultant spoke to me after the assessment and the news was not good. She had either suffered a massive bleed in the brain or the cancer had advanced to the brain and the shock had also made her vomit but she had inhaled it back into the lungs. I knew from her breathing that something drastic had happened. She was deeply unconscious and was going to die at any time - could be a few hours but anything up to 48hrs.
    She was put in a private room,put on a morphine drip and given injections to help her breathing. I was able to stay with her and managed a few hours sleep over the next two nights but her breathing at times was horrendous and I just kept wondering how her heart could keep going. Even though I didn't know if she could hear me I talked and touched her constantly, gave her mouth swabs to keep her lips moist and sponged her down when she was feverish. She didn't respond at all and the consultant told me that her conscious level meant that she was probably completely unaware of anything at all but there was no way I was going to leave her on her own.
    She lasted a lot longer than they expected and I knew that she was fighting it every step of the way but then her breathing changed and we knew that the end was near. We were all able to say farewell to her and I told her that I loved her 'my darling mum' but she could now go to be with dad and would she say hello to him from me. My heart was breaking but I'm so glad we were with her at the end to see that she went so peacefully.
    At the moment I feel lost and empty and sitting here typing this I keep expecting her to put her head round the door and say 'night night love - I'm going to bed now. She always said that even though I then had to get her ready for bed but she liked to think she was being independent.
    I will miss her so very much but I'm so glad that on Thursday night after I put her to bed I gave her her usual kiss and said the words I said to her every night 'Goodnight mum, sleep tight' and I know that if she never heard anything I said to her in hospital I know that she heard that from me and she replied 'Goodnight love'.
  2. lesmisralbles

    lesmisralbles Account Closed

    Nov 23, 2007
    Dear LIZ50
    My condolences to you.
    With love
    Barb X
  3. christine_batch

    christine_batch Registered User

    Jul 31, 2007
    Another Angel in Heaven

    Dear Liz,
    Sending you my deepest sympathy in the loss of you Mother.
    May you be granted the strength to get through the following days.
    Very best wishes
  4. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    I`m so sorry Liz. Please accept my deepest sympathy.
    Love xx
  5. mike1976

    mike1976 Registered User

    Jun 1, 2008
    Dear Liz

    Sorry to hear of your loss.

    It's nice that you got that special time with her on Thursday night. It will stay with you.

  6. Amy

    Amy Registered User

    Jan 4, 2006
    What a beautiful post Liz....Im crying with you.
    It will bring you comfort to know that you were with mum as she died...for that is where you wanted to be. I would believe that she could hear you...that somewhere, somehow, she could feel your love enveloping her as she drifted away.
    Take thoughts are with you.
    Much love,
  7. DianeB

    DianeB Registered User

    May 29, 2008

    Thinking of you all. May Mum's journey to heaven be accompanied by gods most beautiful angels where at the gates your Dad will be there waiting for her with loving open arms.

    Take care of yourself Liz xxxxxxxxx
  8. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    SW Scotland
    Dear Liz

    So sorry to hear of your mum's passing. You must be devastated that the end came so suddenly.

    It was lovely that you could all be with her at the end, and i too believe that she could hear waht you were saying to her.

    She knew how much you loved her, and was happy to go to your dad. Her sufferings are over.

    You will miss her so much, but try to be pleased that your lovely mum is whole again.

    Love and hugs
  9. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    Liz: I just want to add my condolences to the others. I do hope you will find comfort in knowing you did all you could and you were with your Mum at the very end.

    She is at peace now. Take time for yourself.
    Love Jan
  10. gigi

    gigi Registered User

    Nov 16, 2007
    East Midlands
    Dear Liz,

    To sorry to read about your mum.

    Try to take some comfort from the fact that you were with her..and she knew how much you cared for her and loved her.

    Please accept my condolences to you and your family.

    Love gigi xx
  11. jackie1

    jackie1 Registered User

    Jun 6, 2007
    Dear Liz,

    You are and your family will be in my prayer. I am so glad that you were able to be with her at the end.

  12. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    Hi Liz, Sorry you read about your mother passing away, must of seen a shock for you to find your mum that way in the morning . sending you my deepest sympathy & ((((( big hug)))) xx

    ROSEANN Registered User

    Oct 1, 2006
    Dear Liz
    So sorry to hear your news.
    Sending you much love at this sad time.
    Take care Roseann
  14. twinone

    twinone Registered User

    May 19, 2008
    Dear Liz

    So sorry about your mum. Please accept my sincere condolances at this sad time. So glad that you where able to be with her at the end. I know its a heartbreaking time but when you look back on it you will be happy that you where there.

    Take Care
  15. Tender Face

    Tender Face Account Closed

    Mar 14, 2006
    NW England

    Just sending my love and sincere condolences, Karen, x
  16. Laylabud

    Laylabud Registered User

    Sep 7, 2007
    I am so sorry for your loss and i am sure that your Mum despite what the doctors said that she was aware of your being there for her and that you loved her so very much, my thoughts are with you and your family at this very sad time.

    Love & Best Wishes
  17. Taffy

    Taffy Registered User

    Apr 15, 2007
    Dear Liz,

    I am sorry to hear that your mum has passed away.

    I walked your path a week ago, my mum never regained consciousness either.

    I believe that your mum's spirit would have being aware of your presence. My thoughts are with you. Love Taffy.
  18. LIZ50

    LIZ50 Registered User

    Mar 23, 2008
    Thank you so much

    Thank you so much to you all for your kind words - they really have helped even if they did choke me up whilst reading them. I know that your thoughts come from the heart as you are caring for loved ones as well and you can feel the pain that I am feeling.
    It's really strange at the moment as I get times when I think 'oh I'm feeling really fine now' and then suddenly something washes over me and I'm in tears. Maybe once the funeral is over, I can begin to heal and put my life back on track but, at the moment, it's just one day at a time.
    Once again, many thanks to you all.
    Love Liz xx
  19. May

    May Registered User

    Oct 15, 2005
    My deepest sympathies, take time for your self. Take care
  20. Linda Mc

    Linda Mc Registered User

    Jul 3, 2005
    Nr Mold
    So sorry sending you love and hugs.

    Linda x

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