Heya I'm new and this is my first post but any advice would be very appreciated.
Me and my girlfriend are the main careers for grandma (Betty) who is 86yrs old. She has Alzheimer's and has done for the last four years but things are just starting to get to the point where she can't look after herself.
In not really sure where I stand but my mum passed away 6 years ago and my grandma has another daughter who lives 100miles away and visits once every three weeks but tells me the decisions lies with her. She often comes down and tries to change things or suggests we do thing differently when we know grandma much better than she does and her everyday activities. (We spend a good fees days when she is gone putting things back to how grandma understands)
We both have joint power of attorney (me and my auntie) and I between me and my girlfriend we see grandma 6 times a week (we live about a ten minute drive away) bathing her making sure she has a hot meal everyday etc.
We also have someone come in and cook twice a week to take the pressure off a bit. And a neighbour who lives opposite who is brilliant and pops in and checks on grandma daily.
Grandma is at the stage where daily tasks are becoming difficult (she doesn't cook any more and struggles to remember to change her clothes brush her hair) we have also had he wonder out in the night in her pj's once but we think this was down to a UTI. She also said the other morning she got up in the night as she heard banging all around the house and is generally getting more confused.
Recently I have put it to my auntie that we move in to my grandmas to help care for her. (I have my own house but could leave it empty) We both work full time I work shifts and my partner works Monday to Friday 9-5! The problem I'm having is my auntie she won't allow this and is saying she wants to take her in a home near her (that's her preference) or in a home full stop. At the moment she still get on the bus with a friend 1/2 a week , goes to her local club twice a week supported by another friend, plays scrabble on a Sunday and is generally very social.
My grandma doesn't have a social worker at the moment but was wondering where I go to get advice. I don't thing a home would be right for her due to her independence but know she needs more than she is getting now.
I just wants best for grandma and am finding my auntie the biggest obstacle does she have all of the say as I don't think what she is suggesting is right?
Any advice would be great
Me and my girlfriend are the main careers for grandma (Betty) who is 86yrs old. She has Alzheimer's and has done for the last four years but things are just starting to get to the point where she can't look after herself.
In not really sure where I stand but my mum passed away 6 years ago and my grandma has another daughter who lives 100miles away and visits once every three weeks but tells me the decisions lies with her. She often comes down and tries to change things or suggests we do thing differently when we know grandma much better than she does and her everyday activities. (We spend a good fees days when she is gone putting things back to how grandma understands)
We both have joint power of attorney (me and my auntie) and I between me and my girlfriend we see grandma 6 times a week (we live about a ten minute drive away) bathing her making sure she has a hot meal everyday etc.
We also have someone come in and cook twice a week to take the pressure off a bit. And a neighbour who lives opposite who is brilliant and pops in and checks on grandma daily.
Grandma is at the stage where daily tasks are becoming difficult (she doesn't cook any more and struggles to remember to change her clothes brush her hair) we have also had he wonder out in the night in her pj's once but we think this was down to a UTI. She also said the other morning she got up in the night as she heard banging all around the house and is generally getting more confused.
Recently I have put it to my auntie that we move in to my grandmas to help care for her. (I have my own house but could leave it empty) We both work full time I work shifts and my partner works Monday to Friday 9-5! The problem I'm having is my auntie she won't allow this and is saying she wants to take her in a home near her (that's her preference) or in a home full stop. At the moment she still get on the bus with a friend 1/2 a week , goes to her local club twice a week supported by another friend, plays scrabble on a Sunday and is generally very social.
My grandma doesn't have a social worker at the moment but was wondering where I go to get advice. I don't thing a home would be right for her due to her independence but know she needs more than she is getting now.
I just wants best for grandma and am finding my auntie the biggest obstacle does she have all of the say as I don't think what she is suggesting is right?
Any advice would be great
