1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

  1. rjlgriffiths

    rjlgriffiths Registered User

    Jun 10, 2015
    1
    Greetings,

    This is my first post so please be gentle with me....

    Mum's toilet habits are starting to be a major issue for me. Have you seen the cost of carpet cleaners ?? :(

    During the day she is fine..pooing & weeing in the correct places, but at night she insists on using a pot or ice cream tub to go the toilet. 9 times out of 10 she either missing or spills the contents meaning I am forever having to clean the carpet. She often blames the cat, but trust me, I know the difference between cat poo & human poo :eek:

    The daft thing is I got her a commode to use, but she just flatly refuses to use it asking why on earth she should use a toilet in her bedroom....like a pot is any better :rolleyes:

    So after all my waffle, my question is, has anyone else come across this type of problem and how can I try to address it ? Social Services etc have all been in, but she refuses to engage in any conversation and it only ends with her getting upset.

    Thank you for getting this far with my post. Any advice or help would be greatly appreciated.

    Richard
     
  2. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,829
    UK
    Not using the commode yet in time she will, until she does, have you tried replacing what she is using with the commode pot. when she is asleep go in and swop. Or buy a plastic pee pot. Is your mum from the generation that always had a pee pot under the bed? outside toilets made life very difficult back then and its just possible your mum has 'slipped back in time'.
     
  3. mcflod

    mcflod Registered User

    Oct 17, 2012
    44
    Hi

    Sorry haven't had this with my mum but a suggestion to save the carpet, have you thought about putting something down like the kids nighttime pads. I have ones I use on daughters bed at night and they are throwaway but leakproof. Just a suggestion
     
  4. Sianey

    Sianey Registered User

    Mar 23, 2015
    103
    Yorkshire
    Mums toileting

    I've come across it but in the care home. Do you think she can't visualise the toilet?

    My mam was going in the bin and pooing on a pile of clothes and hiding it by covering it up then putting soiled pants in other residents bins in their room.

    It's hard to understand why maybe it's going back to child like behaviour.

    Puppy pads would be a good idea and they aren't that expensive.
     
  5. jeany123

    jeany123 Registered User

    Mar 24, 2012
    19,049
    Durham
    Be careful because I found puppy and bed pads very slippy on the floor,
     
  6. Kazza72

    Kazza72 Registered User

    Feb 10, 2015
    202
    West London
    Sorry you're having to deal with this issue, I find it to be the hardest part of caring. We no longer have carpet in the flat.. Good job as mum decided to sit on the stairs and poop. I feel for you but unfortunately I have no answers. Have you thought of getting rid of the carpet and replacing with a good quality vinyl? Not ideal and can be expensive but easy to clean.


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  7. Risa

    Risa Registered User

    Apr 13, 2015
    483
    Essex
    Hi Richard

    Have you tried leaving the bathroom light on during the night or putting a night light in your Mum's room? Perhaps she is afraid of falling and doesn't like to venture far from the bed when the room is dark?

    Agree with the suggestions for swapping the pot for a bedpan and getting vinyl or even laminate flooring. It is easy to steam clean and keep everything fresh smelling and hygienic (my Mum is continent but my elderly cats aren't always!).
     
  8. elizabet

    elizabet Registered User

    Mar 26, 2013
    224
    Southampton
    Does she use her pot in the same area of carpet - perhaps a huge sheet of plastic on the carpet at night time to protect it. just a thought
     

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