I think I'm just looking for some confirmation that we've done the right thing.
We finally put mum in a care home about three weeks ago. We used the excuse that I'm about to have major surgery (possibly cancer) and my husband can't look after both of us, so she's staying there until I'm well again.
Honestly however, she won't be coming home. We tried to support her with independent living, but she doesn't eat (except KitKats, ice cream, prepared sandwiches and lots of wine), won't let me cook food for her, wouldn't take her medication even when prompted, doesn't understand the Coronavirus crisis so isn't social distancing and wanders off into town 6 times a day. Usually getting lost so we had to go and find her and take her home several times a day.
Close to a complete breakdown myself (we're her only carers), we felt we had no option but to put her into a previously chosen care home.
However, she's continually saying that she wants to go home, packing her things (not sure what in, as we didn't leave a suitcase) and asking the staff to ring for a taxi for her. Even the home say that it'll take her longer to settle than most.
It's possibly not helped by the fact that we can't get her furniture and personal things moved in during lockdown, and are only able to talk to her over the garden gate!
How long has it taken most people's loved ones to settle? I'm worried that it'll end up being referred to the Court of Protection (the DoLS team have warned me that this is a possibility if she won't settle).
Thank you.
We finally put mum in a care home about three weeks ago. We used the excuse that I'm about to have major surgery (possibly cancer) and my husband can't look after both of us, so she's staying there until I'm well again.
Honestly however, she won't be coming home. We tried to support her with independent living, but she doesn't eat (except KitKats, ice cream, prepared sandwiches and lots of wine), won't let me cook food for her, wouldn't take her medication even when prompted, doesn't understand the Coronavirus crisis so isn't social distancing and wanders off into town 6 times a day. Usually getting lost so we had to go and find her and take her home several times a day.
Close to a complete breakdown myself (we're her only carers), we felt we had no option but to put her into a previously chosen care home.
However, she's continually saying that she wants to go home, packing her things (not sure what in, as we didn't leave a suitcase) and asking the staff to ring for a taxi for her. Even the home say that it'll take her longer to settle than most.
It's possibly not helped by the fact that we can't get her furniture and personal things moved in during lockdown, and are only able to talk to her over the garden gate!
How long has it taken most people's loved ones to settle? I'm worried that it'll end up being referred to the Court of Protection (the DoLS team have warned me that this is a possibility if she won't settle).
Thank you.