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Mums Memory Clinic Appointment - Advice

Discussion in 'Younger people with dementia and their carers' started by KitkatKaty, Jun 10, 2017.

  1. KitkatKaty

    KitkatKaty Registered User

    Jun 10, 2017
    First of all I'm new to this forum so hello to all.

    My mum has just turned 60. I do not live with her but I try and support my mum and dad as much as possible, over the last few years has been showing certain signs of dementia. (I noticed this myself and had to convince my dad, he is very stubborn! We cared for my grandad for over 2 years while I lived at home so I knew the typical signs)

    After a pep talk with her she finally spoke to her GP about worrying memory loss and other symptoms. Doctor put her through the a memory test, had blood tests and an exam, a month later she had an appointment with memory clinic, three weeks ago she had a CT scan and today had a letter from the memory clinic stating they are coming to her for another appointment next month! The clinic initially told my mum to let them know the results of the scan because they never get told however, instead they are now actually coming out to her.

    I'm a bit worried about why they are doing this? Could she be given a dementia diagnosis? Also just a note, the side of her face is slowly drooping and her GP believes my mum has been having minor strokes.

    Unfortunately my nan had a major stroke before she died and her mum had a stroke aswell and so on.

    If anyone could advise or if anyone has been through this situation.

    I am planning on going to their house when the appointment happens. My dad is her carer and he is great, he does everything but he is so stubborn and doesn't like asking questions and it drives​ me mad lol. He has told me he would rather not think about what is wrong with her and just get on with things otherwise it would be too much for him to cope with.

    Over the last 2 years my mum has also been diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, underactive thyroid, Raynaud's disease and Sjogren's disease.

    It's mainly my question about the memory clinics next appointment I'm so worried. Thank you in advance and sorry for the essay!
  2. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    You are doing the right thing in supporting your parents and depending on the diagnosis she may get the medical help which will get her through this. You have already had experience of this disease so you know there is no cure but getting the right medication can help with some symptoms.

    Does someone have POA to deal with practical matters? If you do then it will be easier in future for you to deal with doctors and social services etc.

    Good wishes.
  3. KitkatKaty

    KitkatKaty Registered User

    Jun 10, 2017
    Thank you for your quick reply. Yes I've told my dad he HAS to apply for this as soon as possible and he is dragging his feet. I have my own family and 8 month old baby otherwise I would deal with all this but they also live over an hour away. Luckily i do drive though so I can see them enough but I call my dad at least twice a week for a chat as he has no one else to talk to.

    I am one of five children, being the youngest but I feel so much responsibility to look after my parents.

    Thank you again
  4. BeardyD

    BeardyD Registered User

    Jan 19, 2016
    #4 BeardyD, Jun 10, 2017
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2017
    In the early days of my wife's dementia the memory clinic said someone would visit us at home but it was just an occupational therapist who did a memory test, she knew nothing about any scans. Apparently some people's scores change when they are in their home environment. She may also have had a sneaky look around to see if there were any problems but she didn't say that.

    We only got the results of the scans by asking the memory consultant. He explained the scans well but I noticed he was avoiding the word "dementia", probably because he was unsure how we would react. So I asked directly "Is it dementia?" and he then confirmed it. If I hadn't asked we would have left still not knowing. Make a note of the date on which dementia is confirmed as this may be needed when applying for allowances and council tax reductions.

    One thing you can do to save problems later is to get your mum to register you and your dad as her carers with her GP. It doesn't always save the lengthy discussion with the receptionist but at least it's a discussion you can (usually) win.
  5. KitkatKaty

    KitkatKaty Registered User

    Jun 10, 2017
    Thank you for your advice.

    I have spoken with my mum and she is happy for me to attend her appointment for the results. I'm just guessing after the scan they must've found something otherwise she would've been told nothing was wrong by letter. She hasn't even been sent any reports which get sent to her doctor so I'm just worried how bad it is that they need to tell her in person.

    Also forgot to mention the reason they go to my mum is because she is disabled and has agrophobia.

    Okay if she does have a dementia diagnosis I will note the date and the idea for me to be a 'carer' with the doctor sounds like a great idea, my dad has just never been good with doctors or hospitals ect. I didn't know you could register more than one person.

    Thanks again

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