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Mums just won’t settle at night.....no aggression just exhausting.

Discussion in 'Welcome and how to use Talking Point' started by Dear_sue, Jul 13, 2018.

  1. Dear_sue

    Dear_sue New member

    Jul 13, 2018
    Good Morning, I help look after my mum who has dementia. I have just lost my Dad to Lewys Body/ Sepsis and am now left to care for mum along with a live in carer. She does not really understand that Dad has gone however she is just not settling at night and keeping us up till late talking nonsense and checking and rechecking and trying to go outside I suppose she was used to having someone next to her for 60 years. She has been prescribed zopiclone 7.5mg and they have no impact at all. We then tried Lorazpam and they work for a few days then nothing. I am at my wits end and fear I will lose my carers who are exhausted......any ideas at all would be gratefully recieved.
  2. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    Good morning @Dear_sue. Sorry to read of your mum's dementia and her distress. Please accept my condolences on the loss of your dad too.
    You will get plenty of good support on here and others will have more experience than I. Can I suggest though that you get agency carers in to look after your mum overnight and maybe that would give her live in carers some respite.
  3. karaokePete

    karaokePete Volunteer Host

    Jul 23, 2017
    Hello and welcome to TP.

    I would normally suggest anxiety for this but you do seem to be covering that already. This could be something like a grief response or a step down in the disease or even an infection such as a UTI at work. It may be worth having your mum checked for an infection, if you haven’t done that already. There is an AS Factsheet about changes in behavior and you can find it by following this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/sites/default/files/migrate/downloads/changes_in_behaviour.pdf

    Other than that, you may get some advice from the help line, details as follows
    National Dementia Helpline
    0300 222 11 22
    Our helpline advisers are here for you.
    Helpline opening hours:
    Monday to Wednesday 9am – 8pm
    Thursday and Friday 9am – 5pm
    Saturday and Sunday 10am – 4pm

    Others may be along later with suggestions.
  4. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    Toronto, Canada
    Does your mother sleep during the day? Perhaps trying to curtail her napping during the day will help her sleep at night.
  5. Dear_sue

    Dear_sue New member

    Jul 13, 2018
    Hi Mum doesn’t sleep in the day at all. Unfortunately care costs are running at around £5k a month so more carers is not really an option live in is essential to keep her in own home. I will ask the doctor to check for UTI next appointment..... it’s such a shame as she is calm and happy and goes out literally everyday. I thought it may be sundowners but it not every night.... 3 good ones then bam won’t settle
    I have no idea how she keeps her eyes open !!!!

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