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Mum's funeral tomorrow

Emomam

Registered User
Nov 13, 2014
116
Yorkshire
After nearly seven years of caring for mum tomorrow is the day I've been dreading. It makes it so final. I have cried once since she died and I'm not sure what I feel. My sister cries at the drop of a hat and is really annoyed with that and I feel nothing. My sleeping pattern is all over the place and my friends ring me all the time to see how I am. My friend down the road lost her husband 3 weeks ago in his 50's and I can understand her grief. But mum's I've been waiting for for a long time. I have been going through the old photos and recent ones and they make me happy not sad. I have loved nearly every single day with mum and don't regret it. I would never have got the chance to spend all this time with mum without the dementia but at the same time I wish she hadn't had to go through it all. Confusing I know.
So tomorrow we say goodbye and we celebrate her life and I hope she's not giving my dad too much grief for not fetching her sooner!!
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
8,754
Yorkshire
Hi Emomam
just to send good wishes for tomorrow; I hope all goes as you want it to

smiles, tears, no tears, confusion - grief is a surreal mix and wholly individual to each one of us
I love your last line - a mix of tears and smiles in heaven too - both will be beaming down on you with love; grateful and proud as can be
 

2jays

Registered User
Jun 4, 2010
11,598
West Midlands
Will be thinking of you tomorrow as it's also my mums funeral

I've haven't "properly" cried. I've only had leaky wet eyes for a couple of days.

Holding your hand tight xxx

What you have written, I could almost have written the same.


Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
 

SadScot

Registered User
Jun 28, 2016
23
Wishing you strength to get through the day. My dad's funeral was last week. Even writing that makes me feel sick. I never thought I'd get through it but I did. My grief is very raw and I'm crying a lot. Sometimes I just feel completely numb. Sending you love and hugs x
 

2jays

Registered User
Jun 4, 2010
11,598
West Midlands
Emomam : Just shows doesn't it - I'm not thinking straight...

my mums funeral isn't until Friday....

Holding your hand today very tight for today xxxxxx


Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
 

Emomam

Registered User
Nov 13, 2014
116
Yorkshire
Emomam : Just shows doesn't it - I'm not thinking straight...

my mums funeral isn't until Friday....

Holding your hand today very tight for today xxxxxx


Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
Oh 2jays you have made me laugh. I don't know whether I'm coming or going either.
Thanks for the messages makes me feel normal. I didn't cry after my dad died either I went into action mode carrying out probate, sorting mum out, moving in to look after her. I will probably do the same to keep busy. I loved my time with mum and when I think about it I smile not cry as we had a fab time.
I will be thinking of you on Friday and hope it goes well.
 
Last edited:

Rodelinda

Registered User
Jun 15, 2015
172
Suffolk
Emoman and 2Jays - hope all goes well for you both. It's a hard time and I know that my emotions are all over the place as I shift from tears to relief, and feeling unable to do anything and getting on with practical stuff. Take care of yourselves. Sue
 

sunray

Registered User
Sep 21, 2008
1,440
East Coast of Australia
I hope both funerals go well. It is a tough time but in the end knowing you have done every last thing to celebrate their lives here in an apprpriate way makes it all worthwhile. Will be thinking of you both.
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
61,020
68
Dundee
Thinking of you both and wishing you strength.


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