1. Emomam

    Emomam Registered User

    Nov 13, 2014
    116
    Yorkshire
    After nearly seven years of caring for mum tomorrow is the day I've been dreading. It makes it so final. I have cried once since she died and I'm not sure what I feel. My sister cries at the drop of a hat and is really annoyed with that and I feel nothing. My sleeping pattern is all over the place and my friends ring me all the time to see how I am. My friend down the road lost her husband 3 weeks ago in his 50's and I can understand her grief. But mum's I've been waiting for for a long time. I have been going through the old photos and recent ones and they make me happy not sad. I have loved nearly every single day with mum and don't regret it. I would never have got the chance to spend all this time with mum without the dementia but at the same time I wish she hadn't had to go through it all. Confusing I know.
    So tomorrow we say goodbye and we celebrate her life and I hope she's not giving my dad too much grief for not fetching her sooner!!
     
  2. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    7,722
    Yorkshire
    Hi Emomam
    just to send good wishes for tomorrow; I hope all goes as you want it to

    smiles, tears, no tears, confusion - grief is a surreal mix and wholly individual to each one of us
    I love your last line - a mix of tears and smiles in heaven too - both will be beaming down on you with love; grateful and proud as can be
     
  3. 2jays

    2jays Registered User

    Jun 4, 2010
    11,585
    West Midlands
    Will be thinking of you tomorrow as it's also my mums funeral

    I've haven't "properly" cried. I've only had leaky wet eyes for a couple of days.

    Holding your hand tight xxx

    What you have written, I could almost have written the same.


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  4. SadScot

    SadScot Registered User

    Jun 28, 2016
    23
    Wishing you strength to get through the day. My dad's funeral was last week. Even writing that makes me feel sick. I never thought I'd get through it but I did. My grief is very raw and I'm crying a lot. Sometimes I just feel completely numb. Sending you love and hugs x
     
  5. SadScot

    SadScot Registered User

    Jun 28, 2016
    23
    2jays, also sending you love and hugs and strength x
     
  6. 2jays

    2jays Registered User

    Jun 4, 2010
    11,585
    West Midlands
    Emomam : Just shows doesn't it - I'm not thinking straight...

    my mums funeral isn't until Friday....

    Holding your hand today very tight for today xxxxxx


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  7. Emomam

    Emomam Registered User

    Nov 13, 2014
    116
    Yorkshire
    #7 Emomam, Nov 24, 2016
    Last edited: Nov 24, 2016
    Oh 2jays you have made me laugh. I don't know whether I'm coming or going either.
    Thanks for the messages makes me feel normal. I didn't cry after my dad died either I went into action mode carrying out probate, sorting mum out, moving in to look after her. I will probably do the same to keep busy. I loved my time with mum and when I think about it I smile not cry as we had a fab time.
    I will be thinking of you on Friday and hope it goes well.
     
  8. Rodelinda

    Rodelinda Registered User

    Jun 15, 2015
    172
    Suffolk
    Emoman and 2Jays - hope all goes well for you both. It's a hard time and I know that my emotions are all over the place as I shift from tears to relief, and feeling unable to do anything and getting on with practical stuff. Take care of yourselves. Sue
     
  9. sunray

    sunray Registered User

    Sep 21, 2008
    1,420
    Female
    East Coast of Australia
    I hope both funerals go well. It is a tough time but in the end knowing you have done every last thing to celebrate their lives here in an apprpriate way makes it all worthwhile. Will be thinking of you both.
     
  10. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,205
    Female
    Dundee
    Thinking of you both and wishing you strength.


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.