Hello,
Can anyone offer advice or support regarding help managing disinhibited behaviour? Is there a medication that can subdue symptoms?
My mum began using the odd offensive word around a year or so ago, but its steadily progressed. She slips into a 'role' when anyone sees her, quoting the same lines. It's not graphic or crude, but she'll ask about boyfriends/sex life/say she's pregnant, etc. Always followed by a laugh. It becomes tricky to manage when she talks to/around my young daughter and I explain it away as though she's a teenage boy (this sense of humour). However, she's become very 'handsy' and will grab, touch, etc us at times. She'll try putting her hands up jumpers and been known to poke chests and ask 'where'd you get them?' She has daily personal care calls that, unfortunately, are with 2 different agencies. This means there are many new faces in and out of her home all the time, and some of the workers report my mum's behaviour every single time. This means I can be called daily with a different worker's complaint, when my mum's behaviour is symptomatic of her dementia, rather than anything malicious. I feel that I'm constantly having to justify/explain her condition to the agency when they call me, that we're 'wrong' and they're 'right'.
My mum had been given memantine around 5 months ago and, after a review, it has now been stopped in order to measure her behaviours. I feel like everyone is treating her symptoms as a first, as though they've never known dementia to effect people like this. Aside from almost daily phone calls about her behaviour (and me being at a loss of what more I can say/do), another agency recently fully withdrew its service when some workers claimed how my mother talks is 'disgusting'. They described someone that we, as a family, and her day centre, friends/neighbours, etc do not recognise, as we are the ones who spend most time with her, however the agency says they know best.
Aside from my caring responsibilities to both my parents, my young family, my job, etc it feels that it's becoming more overwhelming for me to manage everything for everyone. To set up an appropriate care package (that works!), to deal with constant battles with our local Trust for support, to address complaints as they need addressed, etc is a lot to cope with when I've no other support. Siblings have deferred it all to me and my dad doesn't challenge this. Between appointments (for both), emails, phone calls, meetings, daily living, arranging schedules, transport, etc it's like a full time job. And I've tried to see my gp for support and been given an appointment 4 weeks away!
(sorry, I posted before finished)
I went off on a tangent, but ultimately want to ask others if there's a medication they found helped settle this behaviour so my mum is not constantly reported to me and we can feel confident taking her out and about in public without worry of her causing offence?
Any advice, support, signposting is welcome. I'm feeling so low about it all, I'm struggling a lot and can't afford to go under with so many others depending on me.
Many thanks.
Can anyone offer advice or support regarding help managing disinhibited behaviour? Is there a medication that can subdue symptoms?
My mum began using the odd offensive word around a year or so ago, but its steadily progressed. She slips into a 'role' when anyone sees her, quoting the same lines. It's not graphic or crude, but she'll ask about boyfriends/sex life/say she's pregnant, etc. Always followed by a laugh. It becomes tricky to manage when she talks to/around my young daughter and I explain it away as though she's a teenage boy (this sense of humour). However, she's become very 'handsy' and will grab, touch, etc us at times. She'll try putting her hands up jumpers and been known to poke chests and ask 'where'd you get them?' She has daily personal care calls that, unfortunately, are with 2 different agencies. This means there are many new faces in and out of her home all the time, and some of the workers report my mum's behaviour every single time. This means I can be called daily with a different worker's complaint, when my mum's behaviour is symptomatic of her dementia, rather than anything malicious. I feel that I'm constantly having to justify/explain her condition to the agency when they call me, that we're 'wrong' and they're 'right'.
My mum had been given memantine around 5 months ago and, after a review, it has now been stopped in order to measure her behaviours. I feel like everyone is treating her symptoms as a first, as though they've never known dementia to effect people like this. Aside from almost daily phone calls about her behaviour (and me being at a loss of what more I can say/do), another agency recently fully withdrew its service when some workers claimed how my mother talks is 'disgusting'. They described someone that we, as a family, and her day centre, friends/neighbours, etc do not recognise, as we are the ones who spend most time with her, however the agency says they know best.
Aside from my caring responsibilities to both my parents, my young family, my job, etc it feels that it's becoming more overwhelming for me to manage everything for everyone. To set up an appropriate care package (that works!), to deal with constant battles with our local Trust for support, to address complaints as they need addressed, etc is a lot to cope with when I've no other support. Siblings have deferred it all to me and my dad doesn't challenge this. Between appointments (for both), emails, phone calls, meetings, daily living, arranging schedules, transport, etc it's like a full time job. And I've tried to see my gp for support and been given an appointment 4 weeks away!
(sorry, I posted before finished)
I went off on a tangent, but ultimately want to ask others if there's a medication they found helped settle this behaviour so my mum is not constantly reported to me and we can feel confident taking her out and about in public without worry of her causing offence?
Any advice, support, signposting is welcome. I'm feeling so low about it all, I'm struggling a lot and can't afford to go under with so many others depending on me.
Many thanks.
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