Mums dementia

00000

Registered User
Aug 25, 2013
1
0
I am hoping someone can give me a few answers please. Mum was diagnosed with vascular dementia about 3 yrs ago. She still lives alone but now in a over 55 flat as she leaves her door unlocked all the time, she knows who we all are still, she remembers things from past but not things a few hours ago. She won't make herself anything to eat or drink, she forgets her purse etc, no birthdays remembered, or current year, can't remember how to write words all the time but generally appears relatively normal to others. Is this normal, please advise.
 

1954

Registered User
Jan 3, 2013
3,835
0
Sidcup
Hello and welcome to TP, sorry you had to find us but you will get lots of advice and help here

Unfortunately all you said about your mother is 'normal'. However, everything about this disease is completely unpredictable I am afraid
 

starryuk

Registered User
Nov 8, 2012
1,323
0
Hi 00000,

Welcome here. Sorry to say this is exactly how my mum used to be in the beginning. With increased support from the family, Mum stayed in her flat for a couple of years. There was a big downturn after the sudden death of her good friend and the removal of her driving licence. She began wandering and really needed constant supervision.

She has moved into a Care Home now.

So yes, sorry to say, this is normal and the beginning of a long journey.:( However, hopefully you can make the most of the next little while and treat your mum whenever you can!

(I have a most precious memory of the last time I was able to take my mum walking barefoot along a beach at the sea's edge.)
 

Noorza

Registered User
Jun 8, 2012
6,541
0
Everything is normal, and nothing is normal with this disease, learn to expect the unexpected. It's all in line with what you could expect.

The doctors described Vascular Dementia to me as being in steps, ever downwards but a step down then levels off for a while, step down a little further then level off again.

Water infections are a source of a massive (but temporary) step down so watch out for that they really do seem to make the dementia worse but ok once treated.

Mum's just had a step down this was after a TIA we think she's had many more but this one affected her eyesight so she noticed.

I can only advice you to keep coming back here, so many experienced smart people who are further down the road than I am right now who help support and advise.
 

Amber

Registered User
Jan 4, 2011
57
0
West Sussex
Hi
My 82yr old mum was diagnosed with Vascular dementia 7 years ago. I managed to help her stay in her home until last November although in hindsight I think she should have gone into a care home at least 1 year before she actually did. Mum started forgetting simple things like leaving her purse on the counter at the shops, not remembering what she went to the shops for, not remembering recipes etc. I would arrive to find her eating a plate of vegetables with grated cheese and gravy on! She deteriorated over the years and eventually although she still remembered me and her grandchildren, she wouldn't know how to deal with her finances, cook, wash etc. I got a care plan in place which started off at 2 visits per day which quickly increased to 4. I got lifeline installed as well as door sensors to alert when she wandered and alarm pads on her bed which alerted when she got up in the night and didn't return within a certain time but one day a carer arrived and found her in her armchair with all the gas burners on but unlit, I asked dementia crisis for help and she was put in emergency respite and then SS got her a place in an extra care home but that was a disaster and eventually she went into a CH.

It's a long road and I wish I knew then what I know now as I could have helped her more efficiently but you can only act on what presents at the time. Get as much help as you can.