Im struggling today, it would have been my mums 75 birthday, normally I would have took her presents and flowers to the CH, although for the past 3 years she didn't understand what it was all about. My husband booked a show at the theatre to take my mind off things, but we got a phone call yesterday saying the show had been cancelled , was kind of relieved because I can't concentrate anyway. People keep saying the 1st birthday without her will be the worst, why? surely it will be the same every year.
Hi
we lost My Mum in Law last year
She had Alzheimer's and vascular Dementia
we had have had her birthday, Christmas , Mothering Sunday and the anniversary of her death, They have been hard days but I try and remember her as she was with my Grandchildren and try to be as much like her as I can.
when I lost my Dad I used to get the feeling of heartache both on the day but just before. He died 10 years ago and I forgot it was his birthday on Tuesday and didn't phone my Mum, I feel shocked as I knew it was coming up very soon , but my Hubby going through Dementia diagnosis has knocked everything for six.
I think the way I would put it is you learn to accept it more as time goes on and its still the small things that evoke the memories that make me smile for both of my dear departed family
I hope my ramblings help a bit , take care