I've also never dreaded anything more than the day we moved Dad into care (he's been there 8 months now). As it turned out, the move can go much better than expected. I wrote a thread about it here:- http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/showthread.php?84766-Dads-move-into-care-home It came as a massive relief that Dad never asked to be taken anywhere else (he didn't know what 'home' meant). Before he went into care I had nightmares of him holding onto the bars on the garden fence trying to escape prison. Now I can be his son again (although he doesn't know who I am) and don't have to worry about anything any more, e.g., I don't have to try to get him to do things he doesn't want to do such as put on appropriate clothing, not spit food on the floor, take medication etc as I leave all that up to the rest-home staff. There comes a time when a resthome is absolutely the best place they can be; best for them and best for the rest of the family.