Fair to say Mum and Dad have never had a great marriage, even after 54 yrs. Mum 74 with moderate AD & Dad 77 with MCI now. Compassionate communication and Dad does not wash. Even after 2+ yrs he constantly berates Mum forgetting or not understanding, in part this is his MCI, and in part his personality. The memory team nurse says he has very frontal lobe behaviours and thinking, despite his memory tests being relatively good for his age and does not have dementia. Although his brain MRI scan showed he was in worse shape than Mum! I know with dementia its common to stretch the truth or lie, but I do not beleive Mum is doing either when she says that Dad gives her a hard life. As they live behind me I keep a close eye on the pair, and have had to tell Dad off on occasion. I have Mum going to various activities 4x a week which she loves, but over Christmas/New Year everything will be closed for a month So in the past week and today, Mum has said to me now 3 times she feels like running away. Dad is constantly at her and finding fault with everything she does. I gently approached the subject of Respite Care, which she didn't say no to. My sister has always been adamant that Mum is not to go into respite care, but I am the one with POA for Health & Welfare. Long term, as Dad is not coping with Mum, and Mum cannot cope with Dads lack of understanding, not to mention there are times when safety is in question when alone ( which is rare) and start of incontinence, and a raft of other dementia behaviours, I don't think permanent care will be far off My brother is a bury his head in the sand type, my sister says you do not go into care until you are physically unable to care for yourself, basically bed bound. What about mentally & emotionally ??