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Mum too.

TNJJ

Registered User
May 7, 2019
1,784
cornwall
I spent Monday with mum before I went to dads on Tuesday.
She had phoned me on Friday to say she wanted to get rid of some furniture for the council to take.
I looked up the price but I didn’t book it as I know mum of old.
Arrived at mums and we discussed the furniture. Well, we went upstairs to move it and found that we would have to lift it over the bannister. The wardrobe is now back in the bedroom as she couldn’t be bothered.So there it will stay.
Mum changes her mind so regularly it is hard to keep up.
She is very often getting confused but can still do her bills etc.
She has lost weight as she doesn’t have much appetite either.
Her heart failure is definitely getting worse as she cannot do much around the house now without getting out of breath. Her walking is very slow now. She gives herself another 3 years. I hate to say it but I don’t think it will be that long.
Her decline into this stage has happened over a few months. She has to rest more and is sleeping longer. Nearly 12 hours overnight as well as cat napping during the day.
She has always been breathless but a lot more now, even at rest.
Mum was given a heart failure diagnosis in 2013. She was born with a congenital heart defect.She is 85.But thinks she is 86.She won’t have carers in only me.
 

Canadian Joanne

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 8, 2005
16,710
66
Toronto, Canada
Have you been able to get her to her GP or do you think it won't make much difference at this point?

It must be rather challenging for you to keep up with her mind changing. i think you're doing the best thing by going along with it as much as you can, without actually doing whatever it is your mother wants done.

She's done very well to be 85 with a congenital heart defect.
 

TNJJ

Registered User
May 7, 2019
1,784
cornwall
Have you been able to get her to her GP or do you think it won't make much difference at this point?

It must be rather challenging for you to keep up with her mind changing. i think you're doing the best thing by going along with it as much as you can, without actually doing whatever it is your mother wants done.

She's done very well to be 85 with a congenital heart defect.
Hi. I don’t think it will make much difference at this point. She is on the highest medication for heart they will allow. Plus the highest diuretic they will allow. I cannot get her to the GP . She will only go if absolutely necessary. I don’t have LPOA.I just tend to go along with it. It’s easier.
 

Starting on a journey

Registered User
Jul 9, 2019
439
My mum is throwing stuff out.... on Monday she insisted I found a quilt cover which she had got rid of months ago. I point blank refused and told her we would go to dunelm the next day to buy a new one and get lunch.
She simply said ok, I wanted a new one for the cat......
I don’t have it on me to search for stuff. My mum must have been frightened by teachers cos when my daughters who are teachers tell her to go something she does it. I am trying to copy their stern teacher voice!!
 

TNJJ

Registered User
May 7, 2019
1,784
cornwall
My mum is throwing stuff out.... on Monday she insisted I found a quilt cover which she had got rid of months ago. I point blank refused and told her we would go to dunelm the next day to buy a new one and get lunch.
She simply said ok, I wanted a new one for the cat......
I don’t have it on me to search for stuff. My mum must have been frightened by teachers cos when my daughters who are teachers tell her to go something she does it. I am trying to copy their stern teacher voice!!
I know the feeling. By the time I finish with mum I have lost the will to live..
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
2,742
Sadly lovely you know that soon you won't be able to cope on your own. Start the process now - as you know my mum wouldn't have help but if independence is to be maintained sadly there isn't another choice without it affecting your own health & health issues.

i know i'm lucky that i don't live locally but i hate to think of you going through all of this
💕