Mum Passed Away I'm Feeling Numb

[Lottie40]

Hi ,
Two weeks ago on Sunday 19th January Mum lost her battle with Alzheimers.She remained at home with us caring for her .Those last few weeks were agony for us.Mum was unable to swallow from the Tuesday,she had a syringe driver fitted for her meds and morphine and started to go unconscious.Those last days I found almost unbearable,the palliative nurses assured us that Mum wasn't in pain and was comfortable which is obviously what we all wanted but to see the Alzheimers literally destroying her mind and in turn her body has really affected me even though at the moment I just feel numb.
Mum continued to breathe right up until the Sunday lunchtime .Myself,my Dad and brother were with her,I was holding her hand and stroking her hair as I prayed for and told her I love her .

It's Mums funeral tomorrow Monday morning .This all feels so unreal,even at the funeral directors when the lady phoned through to a collegue to ask something regarding Mum ,I was standing there thinking "oh they are talking about a lady with the same name as My Mum".
I've hardly cried and just feel like I'm watching some awful movie it feels so surreal.I just can't understand why or how the Alzheimers progressed so rapidly and literally destroyed Mums brain in a matter of months.Mum in the bed didn't even look like Mum in the end.
I feel guilty,Mum was only 67 years old and I feel the Alzheimers robbed her of life .

Sorry for posting this but I just don't know who to talk to or what to say to anyone .


Thankyou all for your ongoing support.

Lottie x

 

[PatsyAnne]

Dear Lottie. All I can say is God Bless you all. Your darling mum is no longer suffering. My love to all of your family at this sad time.

PatsyAnne xxxxx

 

[meme]

sorry for the loss of your Mum, she was comfortable and in no pain, that is a blessing.........I lost my mother in October...feeling everything is surreal is very common, in some way I think it protects us till we are ready to feel fully!! ...just get through tomorrow anyway that you can, tears or no tears ....I was numb throughout my Mothers funeral and it was in the weeks afterwards that the pain began to be truly felt.

 

[LYN T]

Of course you are feeling numb. Your Mum was so young but I'm glad her passing was peaceful and pain free.Please take care of yourself.

Lyn T

 

[Noorza]

It's so sad for this rotten disease to rob your lovely mum of her life so young, I am so sorry for your loss.

 

[Grannie G]

I`m so sorry Lottie.

 

[Soobee]

I'm sorry you lost your mum so recently. I lost mine a few days after yours and she was 71 so only a few years older. I also didn't feel that mum looked like herself, she looked like someone else's grandma, not my mum. I do understand the feeling that it's all slightly surreal. I just wanted you to know that you aren't alone in your feelings. x

 

[Carabosse]

So sorry to hear about your mum, my thoughts are with you and your family.

 

[angecmc]

So sorry for your loss, my thoughts are with you and your family especially for tomorrow, I wish you strength xx

Ange

 

[CollegeGirl]

Lottie, I'm so sorry that you and your family and your mum had to go through this horrendous experience. It's just so unfair. I'm not surprised you feel that your mum was robbed. I feel like that too. Our parents should be enjoying their twighlight years, not dealing with this.

Please accept my condolences. I think the numb feeling you describe is perfectly normal, although that's not much comfort.

Dementia is so very cruel.

I will be thinking of you tomorrow and I hope the funeral goes as smoothly as possible.

With love x

 

[Herbie1]

Hi Lottie
So sorry to hear about your mum, she is at peace now, hope the funeral went well, wishing you all the best at these sad times. xx

Kim

 

[Izzy]

I'm so sorry to read of your loss. Sending my condolences and wishing you strength. x

 

[geum123]

Dear Lottie,
I'm so very sorry.
My condolences to you and your family.

Love Geum xxx