Mum newly diagnosed

[serenedreme]

Hi I am new on here. My mum just been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in last couple of weeks aged 68 but had had symptoms since she was about 64. Devastated is an understatement. I’m 35 and very close to my mum. Mum is also my dad’s main carer as he is disabled. So can’t imagine what life will be like as things deteriorate with my mum. Anyone in similar situation - or anyone that just relates to the absolute heartbreak of watching your cherished loved one losing themselves it would be lovely to get in touch.

And thoughts to all of you on here, I think we probably all underestimate our vulnerability and also strength in what we are facing. Xx

 

[Cat27]

Welcome to TP @serenedreme

We all relate to the heartbreak you’re feeling. Please keep posting as you’ll get lots of support.

 

[Izzy]

Welcome from me too. I'm so sorry to hear about your mum's diagnosis. I can understand your feeling of devastation.

I wondered if you have any support for your dad just now. If there is a social worker involved it might be wise to have the care situation reviewed in light of your mum's diagnosis.

 

[serenedreme]

Hi thanks to both of you for the replies. Yes we have care in place for dad twice a day but due to his complex needs (he is C5 quadriplegic paralysed from chest down) my mum is only one that can look after him properly as she’s done it for 20 years. I am a qualified nurse and she is better than me! He has very specific needs and the district nurses and carers unfortunately are just not specialised enough. So is tough situation. Mum does want to continue looking after him as long as possible and I know it gives her purpose and keeps her going. She is scared of what’s to come more for me and dad being left without her, than for herself. Dad also has malignant melanoma stage 3c so when that eventually spreads I can’t imagine mum not being there. Both my mum and dad are my rocks and I am theirs. We’re like a little team and have for each other through everything. Mum also had breast cancer last year and had mastectomy. She is curative and we were just looking forward to getting over that then hit by Alzheimer’s diagnosis. Heartbroken and devastated. Can still have meaningful conversations with mum but her information processing can be slow and her short term memory and retention is in 1st-4th percentile on assessment do virtually nil. She can forget things (conversions or events) seconds later. She loves gardening so that’s her happy place and she is still doing that. She is such an amazing capable intelligent loving person I am still just completely in shock. Life feels pretty surreal at the moment. Thanks for support. Xx