Mum keeps going missing

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Jane898, Mar 29, 2015.

  1. Jane898

    Jane898 Registered User

    Mar 28, 2015
    Hello I was wondering if someone can help me I'm very new to this website and any help would be greatly appreciated. My mother has dementia she's in her late seventys. In the mornings she will go to the newsagents to buy the paper for my dad however on the journey there her mind gets confused and she ends up going elsewhere. This has happened about five times now I have my dad who is extremely worried and at his wits end. my dad is in his late eighties (and as fit as a fiddle). When he finds my mum sometimes she is disorientated however the majority of the time she is defensive and can't see what all the fuss is about. Is there some sort of tracking device available ? So we can locate her if she does go missing again? I find it very puzzling because when she goes shopping to the supermarket she finds her way home but going to the newsagents poses a problem for her.
    I'm constantly worried and to be honest with you I don't know what to do I have bought a clock from Argos which displays the time and the date (as she has now forgotten what day it is etc)
    If there is anyone who can offer me any tips I would appreciate it I feel useless
    Thank you for your help
  2. CeliaW

    CeliaW Registered User

    Jan 29, 2009
    How worrying for you. Just a quick reply and I am sure others will be along with more advice but in collaboration with the Purple Angel Campaign - this company offers the device free and you then pay the monthly running cost. Some Local Authorities offer devices at varying costs so it is also worth asking Social Services.
  3. Beate

    Beate Registered User

    May 21, 2014
    Contact social services, their telecare department can provide free trackers - ours is called Buddi.
  4. Pottingshed50

    Pottingshed50 Registered User

    Apr 8, 2012
    Gosh that must be a worry for you and your Dad. May be Dad should suggest going to the papershop with her in the future. He could make up something saying he has got to have more exercise. Let us know how you get on.
  5. henfenywfach

    henfenywfach Registered User

    May 23, 2013
    Hi!..i care for my dad who has dlb..
    Wandering is a real worry..not because they cant go to the shops physically but when they have the disease and the brain deteriorates.the functions that the brain control like memory reactions..decisions etc can be dad therefore cant understand the danger he could put himself in..

    Firstly i made sure hes registered on the dementia register..if its available where you are..this puts a flag on their records that says they have a diagnosis and clearly will help them if they wander or are found.

    Like others have suggested there are all sorts of gadgets..alarms etc
    My dad had pendant alarm but cant renember to press it!!
    Maybe look at alarms that can tell you the whereabouts with out relying on your mum to press something or remembering to pick something up..

    I generally go with my dad sit in the cafe where i can see the shops and him..he feels independant..and i know hes safe .he has a routine every week..they ve all seen his be patient with me i have dementia card .they only had to see it once..they are very helpful and now treat him properly but with a little bit of assistance..which hes unaware of really..

    Thats whats good about dementia friends initiative. .it make communities more understanding..and helps those with dementia remain independant as long as possible or even think they are!...
    Speak to her local sure theyd ring to say shes leaving..maybe someone could happen to be passing..or your dad appears as hes forgot to ask for mints!!!!..
    It is difficult by when my dad thinks hes still independant hes happier and easier to look after..
    Im waiting for ss to come as some alarms you can get through them..
    Best wishes

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using Talking Point mobile app
  6. susy

    susy Registered User

    Jul 29, 2013
    North East
    Is your mum walking to the shops or driving?
    Can your dad go with her or would that pose a problem for her and cause an argument?
    I'm sure plenty in here will give you an idea of tracking devices. Also if she is on foot letting people know on her route that she may have a problem, they may well look out for her and give you or your dad a ring to let you know where she is if there appears to be a problem.

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