1. Expert Q&A: Benefits - Weds 23 October, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of benefits. It will be hosted by Lauren from our Knowledge Services team. She'll be answering your questions on Wednesday 23 October between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

Mum in hospital yet again

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Anongirl, Jan 27, 2015.

  1. Anongirl

    Anongirl Registered User

    Aug 8, 2012
    2,675
    Mum stumbled and hit the top of her head hard onto the fireplace at the CH. She had a 4cm nasty cut on her crown. We spent the evening last night walking around A&E for hours because she refused to sit down even for a minute. By midnight I was completely shattered and thankfully so was she! Though this did mean she got very angry towards me and blamed me for everything :rolleyes: She got her head glued and a bed was found for her. I eventually got to bed at 2am. Barely slept a wink.

    I expected her to be discharged today but apparently they want another attempt at a CT scan (following a failed one last night) so looks like she will be spending another night in hospital.

    They are having to sedate her for the CT but even through her sedative blur she still recognised me and smiled.

    And so the nightmare journey of dementia continues....
     
  2. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,598
    Female
    Dundee
    Oh no. I'm so sorry to read about your mum. I'm glad she recognised you and smiled. I do hope you get some rest tonight.
     
  3. Sue J

    Sue J Registered User

    Dec 9, 2009
    8,041
    Thinking of you and your Mum AGxxx:(
     
  4. Herbaltea

    Herbaltea Registered User

    Jul 23, 2012
    14
    This is awful, I know I have been there too. Poor you and poor Mother. I dread ever having to go to A & E... sending you best wishes
     
  5. Dazmum

    Dazmum Registered User

    I am sorry AG, what a nightmare for you xx
     
  6. Anongirl

    Anongirl Registered User

    Aug 8, 2012
    2,675
    Thanks x

    I dread that CH number coming up now because I know it's never good.

    Just waiting to find out if they've managed to do the CT scan now. I'm exhausted.

    I have to say that the few hours I spent with mum wandering constantly and losing her rag with me every time I had the audacity to suggest she have a sit down made me once again admire the strength and patience that full time carers on TP possess. It's totally draining. They have my full respect x

    The other thing I find hard is the way people look at mum who don't know her condition. I find it upsetting. The CH is like a little bubble where everyone understands and you don't get those odd looks. I forget about that until mum is in a public place.
     
  7. lin1

    lin1 Registered User

    Jan 14, 2010
    9,322
    Female
    East Kent
    I am sorry to hear about your Mum, such a worry for you.
     
  8. Ash148

    Ash148 Registered User

    Jan 1, 2014
    276
    Dublin, Ireland
    Very sorry too, Anongirl's. The hospital environment is very hard for dementia sufferers. Understand how you feel about the attitudes of others. My mum is at present in a specialist dementia ward in a psychiatric hospital and it guts me that the other patients who are mostly slightly more "with it" than mum are constantly, with the best of intentions, tut-tutting over her condition and feeling sorry for her.
     
  9. LYN T

    LYN T Registered User

    Aug 30, 2012
    6,968
    Brixham Devon
    So sorry to read about your Mum AG. Fingers crossed that she is discharged soon.

    Thinking of you

    Lyn T X
     
  10. CeliaW

    CeliaW Registered User

    Jan 29, 2009
    5,655
    Hampshire
    Hope your Mum is soon back in the comfort and safety of her CH. Any chance you can grab a couple of hours extra kip at some point? Take care, both of you xx
     
  11. Anongirl

    Anongirl Registered User

    Aug 8, 2012
    2,675
    I was beside myself when they put mum on a ward and she was wandering around, confused and agitated, trying to sit in people's beds and talk to everyone. She was agitated, it was midnight and people were trying to sleep. I couldn't get her to sit down and she was getting annoyed at me. She didn't belong there in any way, for her sake or the other patients. I must admit I got tetchy with a nurse because I felt so anxious that i was getting no help to calm her down and people were just watching me.

    I don't know what the answer is.

    She's still in. I hope she can go home today x
     
  12. Anongirl

    Anongirl Registered User

    Aug 8, 2012
    2,675
    I got some sleep last night but I'm full of a cold and feel terrible and very sorry for myself!

    The guilt monster creeps in because I don't think I'm well enough to see her today.
     
  13. CeliaW

    CeliaW Registered User

    Jan 29, 2009
    5,655
    Hampshire
    AG - please don't feel guilty as you can't help having a cold and maybe it's partly due to the stress you are under. Try and take care of yourself for your sake but also for your Mum as by taking a bit of time to get better, you will be in a better position to support / visit her. Its a miserable bug going round and I am desperate to get rid of mine as I need to go and see Mum (11hr round journey) especially as some things have cropped up that are a concern. So join me in some honey, lemon and ginger (and sprinkle chilli powder on that guilt monster!) And hopefully we will both be better soon xx
     
  14. Anongirl

    Anongirl Registered User

    Aug 8, 2012
    2,675
    Aww thanks Celia. I'm pondering dragging myself to the shop to get some honey and lemon but the weather out there looks wild :( x
     
  15. CollegeGirl

    CollegeGirl Registered User

    Jan 19, 2011
    9,534
    North East England
    Oh no, I'm sorry to hear this, AG. how distressing and exhausting for you both. Hospitals aren't always the most understanding of places when it comes to dementia, I'm afraid.

    When my mam fell and was in A&E, the doctors and nurses were all asking her questions and expecting her to be able to answer correctly, even though I'd surreptitiously taken them to one side and explained that she had Alzheimer's (this was when we couldn't speak about it in front of her).

    Another time when it was dad who was taken to A&E (fell off a ladder), mam refused to sit still and we walked all round over and over, with me desperately trying to keep mam out of other people's cubicles and shushing her when she was loudly criticising everyone, doctors, nurses and other patients. And dealing with all the funny looks from people who just don't understand.

    It was a horrible few hours each time, so my heart goes out to you. If you aren't well enough to go today, then don't go. You might spread your cold to other vulnerable people for one thing, and for another you won't have the stamina to deal with all the walking around and other challenging behaviour.

    Could your brother go today, maybe?

    Big hugs xx
     
  16. Anongirl

    Anongirl Registered User

    Aug 8, 2012
    2,675
    Hi CG. It's really not ideal at all, she never wants to just lie in bed or sit in a chair. They need someone sitting with her the whole time. The CT still hasn't been done and so they will need to sedate her again.

    I read her notes and it says she keeps asking to go home. It's just so upsetting for her. I spoke to the CH and the manager said she will speak to the hospital today. She will be missing roaming around all day like she does there and the longer she is out of her routine the more distressing she is becoming. I'm surprised they haven't worked faster because they must need the bed!

    I am just about to text my brother now.

    Urgh! X
     
  17. Sue J

    Sue J Registered User

    Dec 9, 2009
    8,041
    Hope she is back at CH soon AG, wish you better:)xx
     
  18. Anongirl

    Anongirl Registered User

    Aug 8, 2012
    2,675
    Thanks Sue xxx
     
  19. angecmc

    angecmc Registered User

    Dec 25, 2012
    2,109
    hertfordshire
    Sorry to hear about your Mum and yourself. Hope Mum gets back to ch today and you feel better very soon xx

    Ange
     
  20. Anongirl

    Anongirl Registered User

    Aug 8, 2012
    2,675
    Thank you Ange x

    Apparently they managed to do the CT. Now we've got to wait while they look at the scans. I asked if mum is likely to be discharged today. Unlikely apparently. Poor mum :(
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.