Mum hiding soiled pants and pads

[OnwardsUpwards]

Hi, my mum hasn’t been diagnosed yet, we have a GP appointment next month, but have just discovered this.

My mum got admitted to hospital this weekend with pneumonia, so I had to put some things together for her - neither my dad or I would ever go in her drawers in her room normally. But, I found three full drawers of pants, most of which were urine soaked and stained and a carrier bag full of used pads that my mum had been using for ‘occasional bladder leaks’.

I knew my mum was having some unpredictable behavioural episodes and memory loss but this has really shaken me. Is this a typical behaviour with dementia? My mum has always been a very clean person. I am also shocked that she had so many pairs of pants, literally dozens.

Thanks

 

[Palerider]

Hi, my mum hasn’t been diagnosed yet, we have a GP appointment next month, but have just discovered this.

My mum got admitted to hospital this weekend with pneumonia, so I had to put some things together for her - neither my dad or I would ever go in her drawers in her room normally. But, I found three full drawers of pants, most of which were urine soaked and stained and a carrier bag full of used pads that my mum had been using for ‘occasional bladder leaks’.

I knew my mum was having some unpredictable behavioural episodes and memory loss but this has really shaken me. Is this a typical behaviour with dementia? My mum has always been a very clean person. I am also shocked that she had so many pairs of pants, literally dozens.

Thanks

My mum was also a very clean tidy person until the dementia got hold of her, to cut a long story short mum didn't know what to do with her underwear anymore so she hid them in a plastic bag in her wardrobe until i found them one day when i couldn't understand why she had none left. Sure enough there in a plastic bag hidden away was all of her underwear she had worn. before the dementia mum was a very proud lady of her appearance and personal hygiene but that all changed very quickly as her dementia got worse. You will find similar stories on this forum. Mum also acummulated vast amounts of chocolate in her draws which I nick named as her stash in the end. I never commented or judged her for this, because I knew she didn't know what to do anymore, despite all of the years she would have washed her clothes and done what amyone would have done -she couldn't anymore

 

[OnwardsUpwards]

My mum was also a very clean tidy person until the dementia got hold of her, to cut a long story short mum didn't know what to do with her underwear anymore so she hid them in a plastic bag in her wardrobe until i found them one day when i couldn't understand why she had none left. Sure enough there in a plastic bag hidden away was all of her underwear she had worn. before the dementia mum was a very proud lady of her appearance and personal hygiene but that all changed very quickly as her dementia got worse. You will find similar stories on this forum. Mum also acummulated vast amounts of chocolate in her draws which I nick named as her stash in the end. I never commented or judged her for this, because I knew she didn't know what to do anymore, despite all of the years she would have washed her clothes and done what amyone would have done -she couldn't anymore

Thanks. The strange thing is that mum isn’t overtly affected by dementia, to an outsider you would just think she’s a normal 85 year old. Obviously we see the strange behaviour, memory loss, changes in personality etc but she’s not incapacitated as such, so this was quite a shock.

 

[Jessy82]

My mum was the same, it was a mystery to me where all her underwear went, I was constantly buying her more. She would hide them under the mattress, in her wardrobe and drawers. I then started finding poo parcels, neatly wrapped in foil or toilet roll.

 

[Palerider]

Thanks. The strange thing is that mum isn’t overtly affected by dementia, to an outsider you would just think she’s a normal 85 year old. Obviously we see the strange behaviour, memory loss, changes in personality etc but she’s not incapacitated as such, so this was quite a shock.

Thats the whole thing about dementia -you can't rely on what you observe, dementia is not a stereotype -it affects different people in different ways

 

[Duggies-girl]

Thanks. The strange thing is that mum isn’t overtly affected by dementia, to an outsider you would just think she’s a normal 85 year old. Obviously we see the strange behaviour, memory loss, changes in personality etc but she’s not incapacitated as such, so this was quite a shock.

Dads dementia was a series of shocks. You just never what is coming next. I likened the shocks as like a physical blow, a bit like a punch. It's hard to describe but that is what it felt like, a sort of unexpected blow out of nowhere. It is hard to get used to.